Loss jokes
Why was the orphan single? Because it could not call someone "daddy".
Why does a girl orphan want a boyfriend?
To finally call someone Daddy!
What can you never tell an orphan?
Go home to your parents.
Stephen was a great person, and he will be greatly missed, but I enjoy these jokes too much to not stop.
Once there were twins, Mark and Michael. Mark was the owner of an old boat. It so happened that Michael's wife died the same day that Mark's boat sank. A few days later, a kindly old woman saw Mark and mistook him for Michael. She said, "I'm sorry to hear about your loss. You must just feel terrible." Mark, thinking that she was talking about his boat, said, "Heck no. In fact, I'm sort of glad to be rid of her. She was a rotten old thing right from the beginning. Her bottom was all shriveled up and she smelled like old dead fish. She was always losing her water; she had a bad crack in the back and a pretty big hole in the front too. Every time I used her, her hole got bigger and she leaked like crazy. I guess what finally finished her off was when I rented her to these four guys looking for a good time. I warned them that she wasn't very good, but they wanted to use her anyhow. The fools tried to get in her all at once and she split right up the middle!" The old lady fainted.
Memes
Why did the Columbine High School basketball team lose the big game?
Because they lost their two best shooters...
What do emos and the Twin Towers have in common? There were two, but now there are none.
What do you call an orphan taking a selfie?
A family photo.
What do an orphan's father and Nemo have in common?
They are both nowhere to be found.
How do you make an adopted kid bleed? ... Tell him to clap until his parents come back.
Boy: "Hey mom, can we have ice cream?"
Orphan: "What's a mom?"
Kid. What is an orphan's favorite breakfast?
Teacher. What?
Kid. Fruity pebbles with water.
Teacher. Why water?
Kid. Cause his dad never came back with the milk.
What do Jesus and I have in common? Our dads left us...
What do orphans call their parents?
Unicorns because they don’t exist.
What's red and blue and runs up your leg?
A homesick miscarriage.
Why do orphans work boomerangs?
Because it's the only thing that comes back.
Why do orphans eat water with their cereal? Because their father never came home with milk.
What movie do all orphans find relatable?
Spiderman: No Way Home.
What do you call an orphan family photo?
A selfie.
But wait, what family? He never had one.
What do an open champagne bottle and an orphan have in common? They both lost their pop.