How do you find a redneck virgin?
Just look for a 4-year-old. They can run faster than her brothers.
Look Jokes
To Gwen and Freshfry: Hi Gwen and Freshfry, you have been so amazing to me and now to my sister. You are the people who I look up to. People are mean to us because I am adopted. Thank you for all of your support!
Yo mama so far, she makes the Statue of Freedom look like a 6-inch action figure.
Girlfriend: Babe, what do you think of our love?
Me: Look at the stars in the sky.
Girlfriend: Aww... it’s infinity, right?
Me: No, it’s a waste of time.
Girlfriend: I’m breaking up with you.
Me: Whatever, when I take out the trash, I think of you.
(Girl) Do you ever blink?
(Doll) (No reply).
(Girl) You look like a mannequin!
(Doll) (No reply).
Your hairline is lookin' so crusty like KFC chicken and be so discombobulated that it looks like satellite signals. It gives me flippin' sun radiation.
You look like Megamind, drug dealer.
Your hairline is so bad that the queen died when looking at it!
You make Sanic look like a PRINCESS when he's next to you.
The parents used to hit him.
His parents got into a car crash and died.
He became an orphan in an orphanage. The people there hit him. He looked up and said "Parents?"
Guy 1: "Stop looking at my ass!" Guy 2: "I said look at Uranus." Guy 1: "I'm looking at uranus!" Guy 2: "I said Uranus like the planet!" Guy 1: "Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh"
So I suggested to my wife that she'd look sexier with her hair back...
Which is apparently an insensitive thing to say to a cancer patient.
Damn bro, that calculator is looking hot today. It got abs!
Why is Pluto a dwarf planet?
Because it looks like a g-nome.
My friend that used to be married was making jokes about me being short. Then I told him, "Your marriage was so short it made me look like Shaquille O'Neal."
A customer asked me to look at their hairline. I time traveled back to the dinosaurs.
You are so fat that Big Chungus looks like a small Chungus.
Look! An ancient African city!
From the makers of Timbukone...
Hey, what are those things on your arms? They look like cuts. Wait, what? No, it's just marker. Nothing else...
When you want to see and smell your ex for the last time, look at a ugly dog, and smell the garbage.
