Look jokes

I asked this disabled kid what his favorite TV show is. He looked at me blankly and said "My favorite TV show is Vegetales."

I love going to Hooters and looking at the menu... If you know what I mean;)

What did one needle say to the other?

"You be looking sharp!"

What does a blowjob from an 80-year-old and bungee jumps have in common?

You feel the rush, but don't look down.

Lil Johnny looked a lil bonny, but then when he saw Tommy, he decided to bomb me.

A guy walks into a gun store and everything is half off. He looks at his son and says, "I didn't know back to school sales started yet."

You know what the yin and yang looked like before Martin Luther King Jr.?

There was none, it was all white!

Boy, you look like the fake Chief Keef!

Dr. Dre caught his friend Snoop Dogg looking in other people's drawers. Dre then said, "Don't Snoop around."

Let’s say there’s a person who should have never come to exist. How would you find them?

A: Look in a mirror.

My mother wanted to test my responsibility and wanted me to cook dinner for the family to help me understand how it feels to constantly cook for a whole family. So, me with my horrible humor, decided to make a giant joke for when dinner time came around, and so I just got four plates and set them in front of my family and I then said, "Here you are, a fine African meal." Then everybody looked at me in disappointment, and then I continued to say, "What? Poor taste?"

what did the banana say to the banana?

"u look a-pealing"

Roses are red, Burnt bodies are black.

You'd look great With a knife in your back.

What does your mom and a slinky have in common?

They aren't much to look at, but you can't help but crack a smile when you see them tumbling down the stairs.

Why did the octopus cry?

Because his mum said he looked like Johnny Depp.

Charlotte looks like a sperm.

What’s the difference between Jesus and a hooker?

The look on their face when you're nailing them.

Look at your left hand, now look at your right hand, and tell yourself, "Which hand do you cheat with?"

Wanking.

If you want a joke, look at yourself in the mirror!

Guy goes to the doctor. The doctor says, "You look run down." The guy says, "No, I've come on my bike!"