Logic jokes
Why are the Americans good at Rubik's cubes? Because they have a long history of separating colors.
Why does that kid have to stay in that orphanage?
He should just go to his mom and dad!
Even if you do burn down an orphanage, it's not gonna matter. It's not like they have homes.
You can beat up orphans, what are they gonna do, tell their parents?
Everyone: So, wait, let me get this straight. Feminists want to cancel Father's Day because it is offensive to single mothers.
Feminists: Correct.
Everyone: Then what the f*** is the point of Mother's Day?
Why would an orphan kill his family? Because they weren't there.
If a bird flies, and a duck can also run and fly, while a cat walks, why do we drink water?
Do you know what's the difference between a knife and a girl's argument?
A knife has a point.
Little Johnny was playing outside and steps on a honeybee. His dad sees this and says, "I saw what you did and for that, you get no honey for two weeks." Johnny replies, "I don't care, I don't like honey anyway." About fifteen minutes later, Little Johnny is playing with the butterflies and rips the wings off of one. His dad bursts out and says, "I saw that, and for it you get no butter for a month." Little Johnny replies, "I don't care, I don't like butter anyway." Both Little Johnny and his dad go in for dinner. Johnny's mother sees a cockroach on the ground and steps on it. Little Johnny looks and smiles and says, "Do you want to tell her or should I?"
Little Johnny was staying at his grandparents' house, and he asked his grandpa, "Can I have a cigarette?" His grandpa said, "Well, can your dick touch your asshole?" He said, "No." "Then that's your answer." A little bit later, Little Johnny asked for a beer. His grandpa said, "Well, can your dick touch your asshole?" He said, "I already said no." "Well, that's your answer." Later, he was complaining to his grandma, and she gave him cookies. His grandpa came up to him and said, "Can I have a cookie?" Little Johnny said, "Well, can your dick touch your asshole?" His grandpa said, "Well, yes, it can." And Little Johnny said, "Well, go fuck yourself, old man, because these are my cookies."
If you kill a killer, the same amount of killers in the room stays the same.
My friend said, "Why do you have depression? There is so much happiness in the world." And I said, "Why do you have asthma? There is so much air in the world."
Dad: "If they jumped off a bridge, would you?"
Tommy: "Yes, cuz there would be a body pile to break my fall!"
Why do dogs lick their balls? Because they can.
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 ate 9. So what was 10 scared of? Because he was in the middle of 9, 11.
Little Johnny and his dad were going to buy a horse.
Dad: Rubbing on the horse’s chest and butt.
Little Johnny: What are you doing?
Dad: Checking to see if the horse is healthy so I can buy it.
Little Johnny: Oh well, I think the mall man wants to buy mom.
Why do mostly younger orphans get adopted?
Because who wants a traffic an adult?
Why can't you fool an aborted baby? Because it was not born yesterday.
Among Us players after saying "Self Report!" to the police officers who find a dead body in their basement.
Technically, suicide is murder, and murder is illegal, so if I kill myself, my body should go to jail.