What does gum in my d*ck have in common?
Both get chewed on by little kids.
"My dick fell off in the shower!" suddenly a bright flash of white lights. You see God smiling at you. "Joseph, where is your wiener, little one?" He says, chuckling lightly.
My friend came over to my house. He asked where my girlfriend was, and I told him she is in the garden.
He said, "That's weird, I didn't see her." I said, "You have to dig a little."
Why can't I touch little old women, but nursing home nurses can?
What’s faster than a black guy with the TV?
His little brother with the console.
Why did the dwarf work at Tesco?
Because every little bit helps!
What does a gynecologist and delivery driver have in common?
Whenever they’re hungry, they can just scrape a little cheese off the top of the box.
I’ve been munching away on these new Tic Tacs recently and honestly, they are really good.
It’s a little strange how they came in a bottle labeled “Ibuprofen” though, and really, I’m starting to feel a little sick. The bottle’s almost empty though, so it’s time to get some more!
The emo girl in my class did her photosynthesis project on a tree. Little did she know that would be her demise later on.
What does Michael Jackson like to eat? Little weiners
What do parents tell little boys to make them behave?
"Be good, or when you're asleep, Michael Jackson will get you!"
What's the worst thing to happen to a Japanese person in WW2... being drafted as a kamikaze pilot, or existing with a Fat Man or Little Boy?
When I see the little brother in a video get everything, I try it and get grounded ;-;
My mom gives me your stuff because you have bad grades.
Me: How about my 5 little brothers? I have A's; he has F's.
She lets him play anyway and I don't.
When I'm chilling and a little kid ruins my moment.
Dr. Seuss dark jokes.
Hey there little mister, I'm dating your sister!
One day, a little girl was texting her friend. "Guess what, Angelica!" said the little girl.
"What?" Angelica replied.
"I'm a guy."
I bought my son a trampoline. That little a**hole stayed in his wheelchair the whole day.
Little Herobrine, I'm cumming in ur mom! Call me Saddam Hussein cuz I'm dropping rap bombs!!
Dentist: “This will hurt a little.”
Patient: “OK.”
Dentist: “I’m having an affair with your wife!”
