Like jokes

You want to know what the ugly truth looks like?

Go look in the mirror.

Sy'kyira (😌): I can't wait for the therapist to come.

Daina (😊): Same, 30 minutes have passed... I also wonder what that loud sound is.

Sy'kyira (😅): SAME!!!! What, does it sound like a woman suffering???

Daina (😌): I know, right?

A boy and girl in high school started dating for a while and things were going so well that the girl decided to invite the boy on a weekend trip. She said, "I want you to come spend the weekend at our lakehouse and meet my parents. While we're there, I'd also like to take our relationship to the next level." "I'm there," the boy replied.

The boy was so excited that he ran straight to the pharmacy to pick up some protection. He walked up to the pharmacist and told him about his weekend to come and said he needed some condoms. The pharmacist asked, "Do you want the 3 pack, 6 pack, or family sized 24 pack?" The boy replied, "I plan on getting busy all weekend. I'm not gonna stop pounding her till I'm black and blue. Give me the family pack." "Sure thing," said the pharmacist.

That weekend the boy went to the lakehouse and the whole family was sitting down at the dinner table to pray. The girl's father asked the boy to say grace. The boy prayed and prayed. Almost ten minutes went by. Finally, the girl leaned over to the boy and said, "You never told me that you were so religious." The boy replied, "You never told me that your dad was a pharmacist."

I like penguins.

Rape isn't a joke.

It's a type of way of making friends and to mate with other women.

It's a way of art, and works on anybody!

Like this if you agree.

She said she wanted me to treat her like a dishwasher. So I loaded her up, ran her through a rough cycle, and left her wet and broken on the floor.

My wife treats me like God!

She takes no notice of my existence until she wants something.

How is sex like a game of bridge?

If you have a great hand, you don’t need a partner.

What do u call a lesbian dinosaur?

I like alottopuss.

Being a hooker shouldn't be illegal.

It's like having an Airbnb for your dick.

Why is it that skinny men like fat women?

Because they need warmth in winter, and shade in summer.

Horrible Jokes, Part One- A friend of mine got into photographing salmon in different clothing. He said he liked shooting fish in apparel.

Why that Nun didn't like Virgin Mary?

Because she was straight into Jesus.

There are 206 bones in the human body, but I’d really like to have 207.

The twin towers are like your father, they're both gone and will never come back.

His name is Donald, but he looks like Goofy.

Why are orphans so bad at poker?

They don’t know what a full house looks like.

Why do lesbians shop at Sports Authority? Because they don’t like dicks.

What do emo kids like to smoke?

"Marjuanakillmyself."

Why does Yoda like to get molested? Because he likes the Force.