this place is gonna boom in a few days, just like the towers
I don’t like to make jokes around dwarfs.
Simply because they look up to me.
Why are orphans so bad at poker?
They don’t know what a full house looks like.
How can you tell your best friend is gay His meat taste like shit
Boobs are like friends: you have big ones, small ones, real ones, fake ones, but they all get taken out by cancer.
My two friends came to me one day and said they had the best blowjob that they ever had from my little sister. So I ask my sister is it true that you gave my friends a blowjobs. She sad yes. My sister ask me do you want one, I said yeah. My sister gave me a blowjob and wow just like my friends it was the best blowjob that I ever had. As a older brother I couldn't be more prouder.
Why do orphans like playing tennis so much?
Because it’s the only way they’ll ever get love
Do you like soccer? My favorite player is Ronaldo, but we can still get Messi.
I saw my sisters masturbating with a cucumbers and hotdogs. I said "Come on that I was gonna eat that later! Now it's just gonna taste like a hotdogs and cucumbers!
Joe Biden would’ve died in the Secret Service tackle. They would have been like, "Get down Mr. Presi-"
Do you think when the Secret Service heard the gunshot they were like, "Donald Duck"?
Why do Black people not like country music?
Because every time they hear "hoedown," they think their sister got shot.
My boyfriend always likes when I wear my fishnet sleeves. He says it looks great on me, but he doesn’t know that my skin is covered with scars... no one does. No one questions why I wear them everyday. I hope it stays like that because I can’t deal with my mom finding out that I still hurt myself.
The first time riding my bike was a lot like my first time having sex.
It was hot. I was sweaty, but my sister had her hands on my shoulders all the time.
Just because someone is white doesn't mean they are bad.
Sure, white Americans all treat Trump like a deity and are proud of their heritage of enslaving blacks.
But Canadians and Australians don't throw a hissy fit every time they see someone not white, and they don't think Europe is a country.
Why do physically disabiled gay men like performing blowjobs on wellendowed abled bodied gay men? Because physically disabiled gay men preferred eating pepperoni than eating sausage links for dinner 🍽
Every depressed person just has to say "I WANT TO JUMP OFF THAT TALL BUILDING RIGHT THERE" and then points to the building and runs up to it like an immature child and then they get disappointed when they aren't allowed into the building
Talking to a liberal is like trying to explain social media to a 70 years old.
Even people who are good for nothing have the capacity to bring a smile to your face, like when I push my autistic brother down the stairs.
Why does Miss Piggy douche with honey?
Because Kermit likes his pork sweet and sour.