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I was in the car, and I got out and saw a deer walking sexy, and I'm like, "What the..."

Roses are red, I like girls from the South, a 425-pound teacher gets suspended after sitting on a kid's head and farting in his mouth.

It looks like your face was lit on fire and someone tried to extinguish it with a hammer!

"I had a great day today." "Why?" "Because Allison was frustrated at her calculator and started banging it on the side of the table and the teacher screamed, 'Allison how would you like it if I banged you on the table?'"

"Doctor, Doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "What's wrong with me!" "Calm down, calm down. Just pull yourself together!"

I hate my birthday. For my first birthday my mom gave me my life. I liked it when it was new and fun. Now it's broken and sad and I wanna take it back.

So, a person walked into a shop.

Shop guy: "Hey RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD."

This is REALLY funny.

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Thank you very much.

  • 3
  • A big hefty porker left his balls exposed and said,

    "Misses!! Come here and step upon mine balls, please!!! I pay top dollar for this extreme delight!"

    She pippity popped his balls like there was no tomorrow.

    And he said "yuh yuh ay ay crush these nuts nuts!"

    What did the man say when he knocked down the bookshelf?

    Looks like I've only got myself to blame...

    Rhydon- son.

    Rhydon? - mum.

    RHYDON DEEZ NUTS! - son.

    Jeez, ur like ur father in bed- mum.

    XD