Like jokes
Roses are red,
Violets are blue, you look like a donkey, and smell like one, too.
Roses are red,
Violets are blue, I’d rather be single than with someone like you.
Roses are red. Violets are blue. You smell like shit. And you look like it too.
How do you know you had a gay cookout?
All the hotdogs taste like ass.
Your gene pool is more like a gene puddle.
A guy is walking down the street when he almost steps in something. He looks down and says, "Looks like shit."
He crouches down and smells it, "Smells like shit."
He sticks his finger in, tastes it, "Tastes like shit."
He then smiles and says, "Well, good thing I didn't step on it!"
Slavery is like Pokémon, you gotta catch them all.
How is a priest like a wristwatch?
They both start at 12.
House parties are like churches: there's always an underage kid getting fucked somewhere.
How many emo kids does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, they just like hanging in the dark.
Why do vegans like to make their food look and taste like meat?
Same reason lesbians use strap-ons. They still like putting meat in their hole, but they don’t like where real meat comes from.
How do rappers like their pizza?
With extra bars and dough!
Ali from Kazakhstan, he got small forehead, all his friends laugh. They say, "Ali, your forehead so tiny, you need magnifying glass to see!" But Ali, he not care, he proud of his unique look. When he wear hat, it look like top of mountain, so funny, everyone laugh with him. Ali know small forehead no problem, it make him special, like rare gem!
"Rajesh get on bus, so many people, squeeze here squeeze there. He daydream about naughty stuff, like coffee spill but not coffee. Bus move, stop, he press close to pretty lady, she smell nice. Rajesh think how funny if something else spill, make whole bus ride wild." He laugh to self, bus ride never boring now!
"John FK, he think he special car no top, everyone see like he on parade. Me, I stay hidden, secret style, no bullets find me. Much smar smarter, no? Scret lifestyle safety."
Bro, you ever think while driving the moped why they call it a footrest when the foot never lets it rest? The foot is working harder than the engine. You push, push, but still go the same speed like a turtle with a bad mood during a rabbit race...
My dog is named Max, and he likes to eat dog food. Therefore, everyone named Max likes to eat dog food.
Why do Black people go to a confession stand at the Catholic Church?
They wanna know what it’s like to speak to a father.
This place is gonna boom in a few days, just like the towers.
I don’t like to make jokes around dwarfs.
Simply because they look up to me.