I once gave birth to 3 children.
Now their owner is dying.
HAHAHAHA
What is a neonatal's first time in the world?
If you play Minecraft too much, you belong to the streets.
Kid goes to the kitchen.
Mom: What are you doing here?
Kid: Just checking out the knife.
Mom: So you've chosen death.
I had a good day.
I love time.
Your grandma is pretty old; she'll die soon.
My sexlife xddddddddd
The best night of my life was when I gave my virginity to my wife, and her last word was when she called me "Mommy" at the top of her lungs before I knocked her up đ.
If the genie from Aladdin was here, my three wishes would be for you to die, your kids to have a miserable life, and for everyone you love to die.
Caley's life.
Lachlan's life.
What do you call a deaf child?
-Ryan Simmonite-
Why didnât the orphan celebrate their birthday?
Because they didnât have a mom to birth them.
I fucked your mom, that's why I've been paying your life support since you were born.
What is hell to you?
Jesus!!!!!
He is everywhere taking our time and energy and our lives for his entertainment.
But Judgment Day is his eternal hell!
And our Eternal Heaven!!
Me: The man sleeped in a $200 bed in His hole life so why dose he need a $2,000 coffin?
My friend: They're cheaper at Costco.
Me: Oh shit, you're going to have "fun" this weekend.
My life, get it, 'cause I don't got one.
Yo people!
Little Johnny's actually dead!
