Wanna know what my favorite feeling is? Warmth. Fuck I left the oven on!
when you want pringle but a fat person was eating them there was only 3 sweety left
A guy was dying after getting stabbed in a church.he said to the priest please say a prayer for me and the priest said ‘I ain’t got nun left’ then he died
There was 1 gay guy, who kissed 4576 gay guys. Then had sex with them, creaming so hard, all of the dicks cumming on his face. Then he stopped & had sex again x6, now he was left with...
Your hairline is so far back, it left before your dad.
The mom and left the child because they were famous and rich like rich monkeys
why did the lonely fish get a detention? because he left the school
My girlfriend left me today for spending my own money. What a bitch I spend a fair amount of money on her for her clothes and airforces but as soon as I spend a $100 on hookers she leaves me
you only put your under name under Daddyboy_01 because your dad lefted you hahahah
People say my dad left me and was never successful, but if you search up who destroyed the twin towers he will pop up. Also, my moms great grandpa killed Hitler
So my girlfriend left me i took her weelchair and she came back crawling back
A father asked his son, Little Johnny, if he knew about the birds and the bees. “I don’t want to know!” Little Johnny said, exploding and bursting into tears. Confused, his father asked Little Johnny what was wrong. “Oh Pop,” Johnny sobbed, “For me there was no Santa Claus at age six, no Easter Bunny at seven, and no Tooth Fairy at eight. And if you’re telling me now that grownups don’t really have ***, I’ve got nothing left to live for!”
What happened when the japanese guy offered Logan Paul a high five
He left him hanging
My gf left me for spending my own money I buy this bitch thousands upon thousands of dollars worth of stuff but I spend 100 dollars on a prostitute she leaves me
Their once was a man that wanted to join a group of right-handed men, but he worte with the other hand. He got left behind
bobby had 54 dicks (54) he took 33 pills a month (5433) once he ran out of pills, he was left with 45 dicks (543345) (flip the calculator once you got the full number. 543345! he's got a lot!
Your hairline so bad even your mama left you
There were 5 people on an airplane. 1. The pilot 2. The businessman 3. The Minister 4. The school child 5. The Smartest person in the world
The plane takes off, A good, solid 1 hour in, The pilot comes out and says "Ok guys, I have good news and bad news, Bad News is the plane is gonna crash, The good news is that I have 4 parachutes" The pilot says to his passengers, " Well I'm a pilot, I fly planes, People depend on me" Took a parachute and went out. The businessman stands up and says " Well I'm a businessman, I run companies" Took a parachute and went out The smartest person in the world stands up and says " I'm the smartest person in the world, No one is smarter than me" Took a parachute and went out Now the minister says to the school child " Well God has given me a good life, I want you to take the last parachute" and the school child has a massive smile on her face and starts laughing all of the sudden and the minister says " Why are you smiling?!, We're about to die!!!!" and the school child says to the minister "Well actually not gonna die because there are still 2 parachutes left because the smartest person in the world just took my school bag
1 time i went to high five some one ive been left hanging ever since
My girlfriend wanted a marriage just like a fairy tale. Fair enough. I gave her a loaf of bread and left her in the forest with a rabid wolf.
