Learning jokes

If Stephen Hawking was so fucking smart, why hasn't he learned to walk yet?

If you are supposed to learn from your mistakes, why do some people have more than one child?

A teacher says to her class one day, "Whoever answers my next question can go home."

A boy throws his bag out the window.

The teacher asks, "Who just threw that?"

The boy says, "Me! I'm going home now."

Hey, I'm not forcing you to learn the Force.

What's the difference between a school and an ISIS military base? Don't ask me, I only fly the drone.

I lost at Kahoot, so I had to ka-shoot.

When I was little, I would pray to Jesus every night for him to get me a new bike. I learned one week in Sunday school that that's not how it works, so instead I just stole one and asked him for forgiveness.

Grammar: It's the difference between knowing your shit and knowing you're shit.

Where do you learn to make ice cream? -- Sundae school.

Why didn't the bear go to college?

Because bears don't go to college.

I wanted to learn how to drive a stick shift, but I couldn't find a manual.

Today I learned humans eat more bananas than monkeys. -- I can't remember the last time I ate a monkey.

Why do shepherds never learn to count?

Because if they did, they would always be falling asleep.