Learning jokes
Dumb kid: What does homework mean?
Teacher: J0K35? (J0K35 is me btw) can you explain to DK what homework means, please?
Me:
"Half Of My Existence Wasted On Random Knowledge"
Today, I learned that a group of piranhas can maul a small child down to the bone in under 20 seconds. Well, I lost my job at the aquarium today.
"Fuck the school, fuck it!"
I like school.
So in class, they were learning about where food comes from:
Teacher: So kids, where does bacon come from?
Student: PIGS!
Teacher: Correct. Where does mutton come from?
Student: SHEEP!
Teacher: And finally, here’s your homework.
Student: IK where that comes from!
A FAT COW! 😂😂
How to learn your Vitamins:
A = Art.
B = Bouncy Balls.
C = Cookies.
D = Da Sun.
You'll be smarter than a doctor next time you visit!
What is the leader of the school supplies?
The ruler!
Teacher: Great! You’re studying in break time!
Student: Thank you. I heard that it is good to study before sleep.
Why shouldn’t you pick on a midget with learning difficulties?
... Because it’s not big and it’s not clever.
I did a good job of being home from school.
School is the best!
I love school.
Today I learned humans eat more bananas than monkeys.
I can’t remember the last time I ate a monkey.
The moment you realize that school Kahoot! games are more competitive than the Super Bowl.
Why do you joke about Helen Keller?
She was a good person, and she learned sign language and learned to talk. So why DO YOU MAKE FUN OF HER!
Teacher: What does a chicken give you?
Student: An egg!
Teacher: What does a fat cow give you?
Student: Homework!
I love ❤️ going to school 🏫.
The teacher asked her student to say the alphabet. The student recited the alphabet: "abcdefghijklmnoqrstuvwxyz". "Where's the p?" He looked down to the floor and said: "it's running down my legs".
Why do kids have school every day? So that they can learn.
A fish was swimming around in a pond when he noticed a fly flying around about six inches above the water. He thought, "if that fly drops six inches, I could have myself a nice meal."
There was a bear watching the fish watching the fly. He thought, "if that fly drops six inches, that fish will come up for that fly, and I can catch that fish and have myself a nice meal."
There was a hunter watching the bear watching the fish watching the fly. He thought, "if that fly drops six inches, the fish will get the fly, the bear will go for the fish, and I can shoot the bear and have myself a nice meal."
There was a mouse watching the hunter watching the bear watching the fish watching the fly. He thought, "if that fly drops six inches, the fish will get the fly, the bear will get the fish, the hunter will shoot the bear, drop his sandwich and I can have myself a nice meal."
There was a cat in a tree watching the mouse watching the hunter watching the bear watching the fish watching the fly. He thought, "if that fly drops six inches, the fish will get the fly, the bear will get the fish, the hunter will shoot the bear, drop his sandwich, the mouse will go for the sandwich, and I can catch that mouse and have myself a nice meal."
Then it all happened.
The fly dropped six inches.
The fish came up and caught the fly.
The bear came out and caught the fish.
The hunter got up to shoot the bear and dropped his sandwich.
The mouse went for the sandwich.
The cat jumped from the tree, missed, and landed in the pond.
The lesson that can be learned here is that every time a fly drops six inches, a pussy gets wet.