What is a bullet and a police officer have in common... when a bullet kills someone it gets fired
Ok I put one penny down do you smell anything? :1 scent I put two penny's down do you see any fruit? :2 pairs I put three penny's down do you see and law enforcement? :3 coppers I put four penny's down do you see any cars? :4 Lincolns I put 5 penny's down do you see any pussies? : NOT FOR 5 CENTS YOU DONT
Me:911 I just killed someone Cops:Cool we will not come Me:Why Cops:Don't admit a crime. Phones:*Bang Bang* Me:Well that was 2 crimes done.
My uncle is a computer genius! The police even called him a pdf file!!
I was watching the local chief police in America, he said we will never forget 911. I thought i should hope not its your phone number.
There was a car accident and the cops pull up to the crime seen to start asking people questions. The police started talking to a blonde lady and said what happened here she responded by saying a car crash. They then asked but how did it happen, she responded the cars crashed into each other. They finally said but why did it happen. The lady said oh i know where your going with this. It happened because when cars push on the gas peddle the car goes forward and they both pushed it so they both went forward and hit each other. One cop said never mind ma'm and they stared walking away. The blonde lady then said oh and officers my computer froze do you think i should put in the microwave or in the oven?
In History class, the teacher taught a lesson about serial killer Albert Fish. Back in the early 20th century, Fish reportedly kidnapped, ate, and raped over 100 kids. He mainly chose victims who were either retarded or black. Further on the lesson, the teacher explained how in those days, black people were socially not equal with white people, and how people with mental illness were not accepted and treated properly due to a lack of knowledge of mental health.
One of the students raised their hand and said, “You ought to be arrested”. The teacher confusedly asked, “Why?”. The student explained, “Because you’re thinking like Albert Fish”.
Cops go to the hood when the shooting range is closed
One day there was a guy who robbed a bank. A customer at the bank while it happened got the police. Who was that? The police said...... It’s a wood hulem
A lady runs into a police station and yells "help, help". I've been graped then a police officer says "Do you mean raped". The girl then replies "No there was a bunch of em".
What do you say when you wake up to the police trying to arrest you? “Cmon, did ya really think I’d resist a-rest?”
So, there was this cop on the top bunk of a bunk bed. Another cop walks in and sits on the bottom bunk and the cop on the top bunk bed said, "You're under a-rest."©
what does the policeman say to the Jumper?
"hey!Pullover"
There were three men in a car, the driver, a homeless man, and a rapper. The driver takes the to the woods and says, "I'm not really a cab driver, I'm a wanted killer". The homeless man says"I'm not really homeless" and pulls out a chain. The rapper says, "If we're gonna be completely honest, I'm not a rapper, i'm a cop''
Sending gay men to prison makes no sense to me. I mean, you have sex with a man and then they lock you up with a bunch of other men.
That would be like arresting someone for drunk driving and forcing them to become a bartender.
I was going from Germany to Austria and I accidentally crossed the border Illegally when the poliece caught me they told me I was a Nazi. I asked them y? they said I didn't see the border
A lady asked if I heard about the mass shooting in Ohio. I said yes my friend died there. She said I’m so sorry. I said yeah I tried telling him the police had good aim. Worse than that he just found out his sister was cheating on him.
I wont ever Forget my dads last words: "OH GOD THE POLICE!!!"
A police officer pulls a man over. "Hands in the air!" The man said, "okay."
A Pedo is driving down a highway really slowly and gets stopped by the police. The officer asks why he was driving so slowly the man answers I dont wake up the kids.
