Your dad left you because he went for milk.
*1,000,000 years later*
Her: Dad come back!
Him: FBI open up!
Yo mama so stupid, she told the police a kid raped her.
What's the difference between a pig and a police officer?
The pig smells better.
Why do orphans play GTA?
'Cause they're actually wanted.
What did the policeman shout to the cow running away?
"Get to the ground, beef!"
What is the difference between orphans and serial killers?
Serial killers are wanted.
There was a person inside who needed help from the police, but the police changed their number, so he ordered a party with pizzas from 2 airplanes, but the pilots were stupid, so they put people instead of pizzas, and one landed on the 93rd floor and the 94th floor, literally.
These jokes are darker than the list of victims dead from cops.
Why are there a lot of whites in hockey?
It’s the only other job that involves beating something black other than being a cop.
A policeman once said, "I will never forget 9/11."
I said, "I hope not, that’s your phone number!"
The police: Pull over!
The kid: Do you know who my dad is?
The police: What, your mom did not tell you?
Why do orphans play GTA so much?
Because they can be wanted for once.
A straight man and a gay man are talking. The straight man says, "I'm wanted in 2 states for murder." and the gay man replies with, "Oh, that sucks. I'm wanted in 13 for existing."
I wasn't cut out for running today, but those cops came out of nowhere.
How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, they all beat the room for being black.
I called the suicide hotline, and he suggested I draw on myself to distract myself.
I replied I'd get ink poisoning.
Wouldn't recommend, the police came.
I was walking down the streets of Manchester when suddenly I saw Penaldo getting arrested! I heard the officer say, “This time I give you warning, there will be no penalty.”
That’s when Penaldo asked, “No penalty?!” and punched the police officer.
Shame on you Penaldo!
I don't understand why, when I went to the shooting range today, the police came. Like, bro, I always go to elementary schools.
What did the woman do when the armed police officer raped her?
Freeze.
when is it normal to freeze before being raped?
when a policeman rapes you.
