Laughter jokes
So I got my sister shampoo for her birthday, and she stood there and threw her wig on the floor.
Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the udder side.
Nobody finds that one funny.
What do you call a room full of disabled people with epilepsy?
A seizure salad.
— Wanna hear a joke about ghosts?
— No.
— That's the spirit!
I know it sounds cheesy, but I feel grate!
People might not laugh at my jokes, or have a reaction at all, but I'd explode with euphoria.
Periodically, people might laugh every now and then.
A friend was doing bird puns on me. Then I realized that toucan play at that game.
How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh?
Ten tickles.
These aren't funny.
What did the chef say to the skeleton?
"Bone appetit!"
"How was your day?"
"It was great."
"What was so great about it?"
"I saw a puppy."
"Awww."
"And I ran over it :)"
"Grandma, tell me a story!" I said as we huddled near the campfire.
"Alright," she said, "Once, there was a tree named Timmy, he was my best tree friend. I used to read books under him and climb all his branches."
"Where is Timmy now?" I asked.
Grandma pointed to the campfire.
My son said, "What rhymes with orange?"
I said, "No, it doesn't!"
What's red and bubbly and scratches at the microwave glass?
A baby in the microwave!
What did the kid with Down syndrome say to his friend?
Nothing, he had no friends.
Christopher and Tony were tempted for a beer, but they only had 2 dollars each.
Christopher got an idea and ran away to the butcher to see if he could get something good. He came back with a sausage. So they went to a pub and ordered 2 beers and 2 whiskeys.
"Are you crazy?!" said Tony to Christopher. "We don't have any money!"
"Take it easy now," said Christopher. "I have a plan."
When they finished drinking everything up, Christopher put the sausage through his own zipper and begged Tony to bend on his knees and take the sausage with his mouth.
The bartender saw what they did and threw them out without even paying. So Christopher and Tony kept doing the same thing pub after pub after pub.
After the 10th pub, Tony said: "I can't do this anymore. I am drunk, and my knees are in too much pain to even handle the walk."
"How do you think I feel?" said Christopher, exhausted. "I dropped the sausage in the 3rd pub!"
"Knock, knock.""Who's there?""Kid.""Kid who?""Kidnap you!"
Bunger got me like:
😂 Face with Tears of Joy Emoji - Emojipedia https://emojipedia.org › face-with-tears-of-joy A yellow face with a big grin, uplifted eyebrows, and smiling eyes, each shedding a tear from laughing so hard. Widely used to show something is funny or...
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
UR MUM!
I have 206 bones, but when I see you, I have 207.