What did the cow say to the sheep? “Moo!” What did the sheep say to the cow “That was a bad joke!”
heres a list of puns not all of them are mine
1.Smaller babies may be delivered by stork but the heavier ones need a crane.
2.Yesterday, I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The doctor says I’m okay, but I feel like I’ve dyed a little inside.
3. My sister bet that I couldn’t build a car out of spaghetti. You should’ve seen her face when I drove pasta.
4. Getting the ability to fly would be so uplifting.
5.Two windmills are standing in a wind farm. One asks, “What’s your favorite kind of music?” The other says, “I’m a big metal fan.”
6.Why was the cookie sad? Because his mom was a wafer long!
7.Why didn’t the cat go to the vet? He was feline fine!
8.How do you make a good egg-roll? You push it down a hill!
9.That baseball player was such a bad sport. He stole third base and then just went home!
10.My parents said I can’t drink coffee anymore. Or else they’ll ground me!
*WARNING* THIS WILL NEVER GET OUT OF YOUR HEAD - READ IF YOU DARE.....
What came first? The chicken or the egg?
Which came first? The colour orange or the fruit?
Who taught the first ever teacher?
If you expect the unexpected, doesn't that make the unexpected expected?
If you describe something as 'indescribable', then haven't you already described it?
In the word 'scent', is the silent letter the 's' or the 'ce'?
Why do your lips touch when they say the word 'seperate', but don't touch when you say the word 'together'?
How many photos do you think you could be in the background of?
The guy who discovered cow milk, what was he doing with that cow?
Do regular dogs see police dogs and think, "Oh no, its a cop"?
Is it possible to cry underwater?
If two left handers have an argument, who is right?
I warned you!! You just didn't listen.... :O
What’s the difference between an onion and a photo of a dead relative, nothing they both make you cry when you look at it
Six out of seven dwarfs aren’t Happy.
Wanna hear a poop joke? Nah, they always stink
Why did the cow cross the road? To get to the udder side.
Nobody finds that one funny.
I kept asking these kids where there parents are and they started crying, I walked away laughing thinking i love my job at an orphanage
(everyone on titanic) ahhhhhhhhhhhhh the ship will sink!!!! (person washing hands) im using the sink wait your turn!!!!! (all crew members laugh) hahahhahahahahah.
- wanna hear a joke about ghosts? - no - THATS THE SPIRIT!
so i got my sister shampoo for her birthday and she stood there and threw her wig on the floor
Helicopter, Helicopter Kobe Bryant in my chopper Sitting next to burning daughter Lots of smoke and little laughter
I know it sounds cheesy, but I feel grate!
People might not laugh to my jokes, or have a reaction at all, But I'd explode with euphoria. Periodically, people might laugh every now and then.
Three women- a blonde, a brunette and a redhead- are riding through the desert on a dune buggy. About two two hours later their vehicle dies with no gas and they're forced to travel to their destination on foot, but they all agree to carry something with them. The brunette brings canteens of water. The redhead takes a large beach umbrella. The Blonde somehow rips off the car door. The redhead asks her, "Why did you take the whole car door?" To which the blonde replied, "So I can roll down the window in case it gets too hot."
A friend was doing bird puns on me. Then I realised that toucan play a game.
How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh?
Ten tickles.
What did the chef say to the skeleton? "BONE Apetit!"
These aren't funny
"How was your day?" "It was great" "what was so great about it?" "i saw a puppy" "awww" "and i ran over it :)"
