Language jokes
What’s a nut’s favorite Shakespeare line?
“To be or nut to be.”
You know, "f" in orphan stands for family.
I called the suicide hotline in Afghanistan, and they got excited and asked if I could drive a B-52.
Q: If a cat says to a dog, "All dogs are liars," and the dog says to the cat, "All cats are liars," what does it mean?
A: It means cats and dogs can talk.
A girl's pussy is a muff, and when we have something against our mouths, they say our voice is muffled, so do I think the origin of the word "muffled" is talking while eating muff?
Me and Who?
Bitch, I can make orange rhyme with banana.
BORNANA
Si, papi?
Wanna hear a couple of short jokes and a long joke?
Joke,
Joke,
Jooooooooooooooke.
Anonymous 1: Why are you crying?
Anonymous 2: No, buddy, come to my finral.
I didn't steal it. 🌚
I love the letters of the alphabet.
What did the ass say to the joke?
"You crack me up!"
in (DYM 102).
What did the tiger say to the bunny?
Nice to meat you!
Say:
"Eye"
Spell:
"Map"
Say:
"Ness"
Now say it fast!
A student asked a teacher, "How do you pronounce this word? It's spelled A-L-L-I-E-D."
The teacher was about to answer, but then the student said, "Actually, I know how to pronounce it. I lied!" (allied)
Look at my name and you'll see the joke (read it out loud).
Stormtrooper: What happened to the Jedi Order?
Palpatine: Slew it!
What comes next in the pattern, ottffs?
S, because it represents numbers going up: one, two, three, four, five, six, seven.
People who make puns always get pun-ched by people.
I had a friend named Wemiyoe... We call him "we me you."