Know jokes

What’s the difference between an ant and an orphan?

The ant knows where home is.

Did you know Paul Walker had dandruff?

Neither did I until I found his Head and Shoulders in the glove compartment.

Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be wanted.

You know, the earth was flat till they buried your mama.

A priest says to me, "Come up, my child." Then I said, "Do I know you? Because you're not my father."

How do you know you've found a priest? When little Timmy is glued to his crotch.

Why are orphans so bad at poker?

They don’t know what a full house looks like.

How do you know when a fat person stops eating? You read about it in the obituary.

What’s the best thing about Switzerland?

I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus.

What's the difference between an orphan and a baseball player?

The baseball player knows where home base is.

Did you know an orphan is deeply religious because they can finally call someone "father."

Why can't a missing child play baseball? Cuz he doesn't know where home is.

I still don't know what's the worst, most dangerous place to take your children on holiday, but, for certain, it's either Vatican City or Neverland Ranch.

I asked my orphan friend what his movie is, he said "Spiderman: No Way Home." I said, "Probably because it's so relatable, right?" He started crying. I don't know why.

Do you know what the F in Orphan stands for?

Family.

Why can't orphans operate Apple devices?

Because they don't know how to use the home button.

Little Johnny sits on a chair. He notices he is sitting on something. Then he sees a plastic di**. He asks his mom, "What's that?" and Mom didn't know, so when his dad comes home from work, he sees him with the plastic di** and says, "Son, why you messing with my personal toy?"

My BFF asked me: "You know why it took Carlos 3 days to move on?"

I said: "Why?"

My BFF says: "Well, it's because he was already cheating!"

I said: "KNEW IT!"

Did you know the past tense of William Shakespeare is Wouldiwas Shookspeared?

The real dead hooker joke is on all of us from the Fraser Valley in BC. You know damn well each and everyone of us ate that Pickton hooker pork. Considering it stretching from the 80's-2000's, pretty sure he got 4 generations of Valley folk with that Pickton pork.