Know jokes
Did you know that Uranus is as big as the moon?
Friend 1: I don't want to jump.
Friend 2: Me neither.
Murderer: If you don't jump, I'll stab you.
Friend 1: *jumps*
Friend 2: *jumps*
Murderer: I didn't mean off the building!
Friend 1: I know that. I just pretended to jump to get rid of that guy.
I am only familiar with 25 letters of the alphabet.
I don't know why.
A blonde walks in and says, "I want to buy that TV."
The seller says, "I don't sell to blondes."
The blonde comes back the next day with brown hair and says, "I want to buy that TV."
The seller says, "I don't sell to blondes."
The blonde comes back the next day with brown hair and says, "I want to buy that TV."
The seller says, "I don't sell to blondes."
The blonde asks, "That's it, how'd you know I was a blonde?"
The seller replies, "Because that's a microwave."
What do you call an animal that knows karate? Moose Lee đđ
Memes
The couple next door made a porn film.
They donât know it yet.
Did you know that Americans fall out of both sides of the bed?
Quote for the day.
I looked this quote up, but it really is a good thing, just for starters.
"Sometimes you will never know the VALUE of a moment until it becomes a MEMORY."
Also, loving is so much more to give instead! Always remember to love!!! Best-Gwen :)
Do you want to know the most racist game? Chess. You wanna know why? Because they never let black go first. I wonder why... lmao.
Why can orphans play baseball? Because they don't know where home is.
So you know those people that commit suicide by hanging themselves? I guess they lost Hangman.
Do you know what's the difference between a knife and a girl's argument?
A knife has a point.
What did the little girl with no arms get for Christmas?
I don't know, she's still trying to open it...
Do you know youâre supposed to wash your sex toys after you use them?
I guess thatâs why Catholics invented baptism.
I got caught doing donuts in the parking lot, and I know what y'all are thinking.
Who names their dog Donuts?
Oh, sh**! I'm late for my interview! Do you know where the nearest sex offender registry is?
Why do orphans become criminals? To know what itâs like to be wanted.
Why are orphans bad at poker? They donât know what a full house is.
I saw a child crying yesterday, so I asked him where his parents were. Bad move. I got fired from my job at the orphanage.
What do you call an orphanâs family reunion? Me time.
Did you know? The letter âfâ in orphan stands for family.
What is an orphanâs least favorite song? We Are Family.
Whatâs an orphanâs least favorite TV show? Family Guy.
Whatâs an orphanâs least favorite movie? Meet the Parents.
Whatâs an orphanâs least favorite type of music? House.
Whatâs an orphanâs least favorite store? Home Depot.
Whatâs an orphanâs favorite band? Foster the People.
What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.
Where do orphan chickens end up? Foster Farms.
What beer do orphans drink? Fosterâs.
Why do orphans have water with their cereal? Because their dad never came back with the milk.
What do you call a fish with no parents? An orfin.
Why do orphans like playing tennis? Because itâs the only love they get.
Me: Are you an orphan? Orphan: Yes, what gave me away? Me: Your parents.
Q: How do you know an Asian person was in your house?
A: Your homework is done, breakfast is made, and your cat is gone.
So, I know that there are a lot of egg yolks on this website, and I guess I got beat to it, but I'm eggcited to say eggsactly what the eggs say.
I know I'm bad at this, but I hope you will crack up anyway.
Did you know that Helen Keller had a dog?
Well, neither did she!