Know jokes

You know the saying "One man's trash is another man's treasure?"

Wonderful saying! Horrible way to find out you're adopted! :DD

Why did they make bus stops? So the bus driver would know where to pick the orphan up.

When the school shooter is getting roasted because of his Pokemon lunch box, but they don't know that there is a Glock 34 inside.

You know, life as a pufferfish is tough. They get startled, then they get hard.

You know this joke really cracks up my bones!

💔 The Broken Family 💔 . Part 1

Girl: Mom, dad tried to have sex with me last night.

Mom: Are you serious?? (Shocked)

Girl: Yah. He said I must kiss him after he didn't want to let me go.

Mom: Am gonna kill ur dad (Angry)

Girl: Please mom, we still need him, who will buy use food and clothes. You don't have a job mom.

Mom: But what he did was wrong.

Girl: I know.

(SOUND OF A CAR COMING IN)

Mom: Is that ur dad.

Girl: Yes Mom

Comment Part 2

Jesus shows up and says you’ve got to go to church.

You follow him in, and under their breath, it sounds like somebody says, "You steal." You say in your mind, knowing you have before, "I’m sorry." Then somebody coughs, and under their breath, it sounds like they say again, "You steal," so you whisper quietly, "I’m sorry."

...then somebody in German says, "Schieß den Hurensohn!"

How do you know if your wife is dead?

Sex is the same, but the dishes keep piling up.

A married woman gets hit by a truck, and the cops tell her husband:

Cop: "Sir, it looks like your wife's been hit by a truck."

Man: "I know, but she has a great personality."

Someone came to me and said, "Your dad is gay." I just said, "Wait. You know where my dad is? Please tell me!"

Want to know how to keep an idiot in suspense???

My mom: "Dear, I don't know why your grandma is spending more time with her friend Carla, can you spy on her?"

Me: "Your mom gay lol."

My mom: "Don't talk about your grandma like that, you rude girl."

You: "Your mom gay lol."

Did you know Disney is making a movie for suicidal people?

They're calling it Finding Emo.

How do you know you’re at a gay cookout? They’re putting your sausage between two buns.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

A.

A who?

A-bless you!

Dear algebra,

I don't want to find your X. I don't know Y she left you.

Do you know why I don't like stairs? They are always up to something. #dadjokes

What's the time?

How would I know?

Why can’t an orphan play baseball?

Because he doesn’t know where home is.

I've been going to the dentist for a while now, I know the drill.