Knock jokes
A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can.
Three years later there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says: “What the hell was that all about?”
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Who.
Who who?
Stop acting like an owl!
The next time I knock on your door, I'll hit you instead of the door.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Your dad.
But my dad's dead.
I know, just reminding you!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
No one.
No one who?
...
Little Johnny has no arms. Knock, knock, who's there?
Not Johnny.
Yeah, she called me "Pledge" because I knocked the dust off it.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Sally.
Sally who?
You're going to bed right now.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
I suck.
I suck who?
Michael Jackson.
So, I'm sitting here smacking on some cheese ball BBQ, my titties, and then I saw the most a shoe got shoveled all the way up my ass. I cried, then turned around and said, "MOTHERFUCKING COCK SUCK FUCKIN GAY ASS HOE SHOVIN SHOE'S UP MY ASS SON OF A BITCH!" Then turned around, punched the guy, got smacked in the face, went in for another punch, got smacked in the face, then people staring at me. I said, "WTF are you staring at?" I punched as hard as I can, then got knocked out. I thought this, "This isn't over motherfucker, I'm gonna find you and kill you." Next thing I knew, I was in the hospital. They told me, "Why tf were you fighting a stop sign?" I said, "What? You were fighting a motherfuckering stop sign?" I said, "Bitch, I ain't crazing yo head a stop sign son of a bitch fuck my pussy u must be high! hai es a bitch muhfuhcka"
My mom told me that she got a new job & I don't have to leave the house.
Then my mom told all my customers are the men that live in our neighborhood.
Then I ask what is your job call. My mom said job hand, then I said job and or is hand job.
My mom said yeah that it. My mom said I'm good at my job that why all the males are always knocking at the door.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Ligma.
Ligma who?
Ligma balls!
Stranger: Knock knock.
Person: Who's there?
Stranger: Sugma.
Person: Sugma who?
Stranger: Sugma balls, kid!
Knock knock! Who's there? Stripper. Stripper who? Stripper down!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
I eat mop.
A-I eat mop who?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Pencil.
Pencil who?
Oh, never mind, it's pointless.
I told Siri about my dog, and she told me if she could tell me a joke to cheer me up, and I said okay.
She asked me, "Knock knock." I said, "Who is there?" She said, "Not your dog."
What's the only punch that can knock out a 21 year old?
A Sandy Hook.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Ken.
Ken who?
Can you walk the dog for me?
Knock knock. Who’s there? Ur uncle. What? Is ur RBLX gf?