Knock jokes
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Utah.
Utah who?
You're talking to me.
This guy comes knocking on the door in hell and speaks to God. "Please let me out, it is too cold in here!"
God is all confused. "There is a big fire in there!" The guy answers, "Yes, there is, but you cannot get near it. All the bishops, cardinals, and priests are sitting around it."
The bears came home. Daddy bear said, "Who's been eating my porridge?" said, "Who's been in my porch?" Baby bear said, "Never mind about the porridge, who knocked the telly?"
Knock knock.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Ruff ruff.
Ruff ruff who?
Let the dogs out.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Goliath.
Goliath who?
I need to Goliath down and sleep!
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Broccoli.
Broccoli who?
Broccoli hasn’t got a surname!
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Cabbage.
Cabbage who?
Cabbage doesn’t have a last name.
Knock knock. Who's there? Well, I will tell you who's not there: my dad.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Nacho.
Nacho who?
Nacho Cheese!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Donut.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Ahoy Mateys.
Ahoy Mateys who?
Ahoy mateys, balls fit in your mouth? LOLOLOLOLOLOL
Knock knock. Who's there? Europe. Europe who? (You're a poo.)
Knock, knock.
Your mom.
Man 1: Knock knock.
Man 2: Who's there?
Man 1: Ice.
Man 2: Ice who?
Man 1: I crushed your head.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Terrier.
Terrier who?
Your Halloween decorations are terri-fying!
Knock, knock? Who's there? A mirror, I'm lonely.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
911.
911 who?
You said you would never forget.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Me.
Me who?
Not me.
A man is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door.
He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch.
He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can.
Three years later there's a knock at the door.
He opens it and sees the same snail.
The snail says, "What was that all about?"