Knight jokes
Why is the queen in chess the most powerful piece? Because the board looks like a kitchen floor.
One night a guy asked his wife where she wanted to eat. She said, "Chinese food," so he flew her to China. The next night, he asked her what she wanted to eat. She said, "Indian food," so he flew her to India. The last night, he said, "What do you want to eat?" and she said she wanted nothing, so he flew her to Africa.
I just beat the Hollow Knight and found it takes 26 hours to beat it, but it took me 69 hours to beat it.
Once upon a time, there were three kingdoms, all bordering on the same lake. For centuries, these kingdoms had fought over an island in the middle of that lake. One day, they decided to have it out, once and for all.
The first kingdom was quite rich and sent an army of 25 knights, each with three squires. The night before the battle, the knights jousted and cavorted as their squires polished armor, cooked food, and sharpened weapons. The second kingdom was not so wealthy and sent only 10 knights, each with two squires. The night before the battle, the knights cavorted and sharpened their weapons as the squires polished armor and prepared dinner. The third kingdom was very poor and only sent one elderly knight with his sole squire. The night before the battle, the knight sharpened his weapon, while the squire, using a looped rope, slung a pot high over the fire to cook while he prepared the knight’s armor.
The next day, the battle began. All the knights of the first two kingdoms had cavorted a bit too much (one should never cavort while sharpening weapons and jousting) and could not fight. The squire of the third kingdom could not rouse the elderly knight in time for combat. So, in the absence of the knights, the squires fought.
The battle raged well into the late hours, but when the dust finally settled, a solitary figure limped from the carnage. The lone squire from the third kingdom dragged himself away, beaten, bloodied, but victorious.
And it just goes to prove, the squire of the high pot and noose is equal to the sum of the squires of the other two sides.
Why did the knight cross the road?
He can't because his armor was too heavy.
Why did the knights laugh when they run?
The grass tickled their balls. 😅😂🤣
One knight, a king, and a queen went fishing. They each caught one fish, so how did three fish end up in the bucket?
One "knight"!!!
I hop on Clash Royale. I see Mega Knight. I cry.
Like if you hate the Mega Knight from Clash Royale because I really, really hate it so much!
What do you call a knight that has one arm? A first battle night.
What do you call a knight that lost both arms? A two battle useless knight.
As ruler of a kingdom, I wanted a knight. Duke Leo Pessi IV offered himself but wanted a wife in return. I offered my beautiful daughter to him. However, he slapped her and proceeded to wreck my castle. All this whilst crying “I don’t want princess, I want farmer!”
DAMN YOU PESSI!
What is an owl that wears armor?
16 is a knight? Mail.
Batman: Arkham Knight, developed by Rocksteady Studios, is the final installment in the critically acclaimed Batman: Arkham series. Released in 2015, the game is renowned for its immersive gameplay, compelling narrative, and stunning visual design, offering players an unparalleled experience of stepping into the shoes of the iconic Dark Knight.
The game's narrative is one of its standout features. Set one year after the events of Batman: Arkham City, the story sees Batman facing the ultimate threat against Gotham City. The Scarecrow returns to unite an impressive roster of super villains, including Penguin, Two-Face, and Harley Quinn, with a singular goal - to destroy Batman forever. The narrative is dark, intense, and filled with surprising twists, keeping players engaged till the very end.
In terms of gameplay, Batman: Arkham Knight introduces the Batmobile as a drivable vehicle, adding a new dimension to the series' signature gameplay elements. The game's combat system is fluid and satisfying, allowing players to feel the power of Batman with every punch and kick.
What do you call a rapper who works in the bakery?
DOUGH-KNIGHT
The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumeference. He acquired his size from too much pi.
Why doesn’t the US want to play chess with the UK?
The US is already down 2 towers, and the UK has an unkillable queen.
Have you ever met a knight with a metanite at night?
Why is the USA so bad at chess?
Because they already lost two towers.
Once a knight was called a "kuhnigitt," that's because he was one!
In British chess I guess they play without a queen...
But in American chess they play without 2 towers.