Kids jokes

Little Johnny asked the teacher why you were no shirt. Teacher says, "Because I want to." The teacher drops her pencil and picks it up. The class starts laughing.

"What's so funny?" A kid took off your bra, and we see your squish sexy boobs.

What do grapes 🍇 love most about family?

Raisin kids!

Don't ever try to give an emo kid a high five. They'll just leave you hanging.

God sent a kid to the principal's office for giving a blind kid sunglasses and said, "Don't let the sun damage your eyes!"

Go to an orphanage and tell the kids their parents came back as an April Fools' joke.

Hey, Squidward, say "kid" backward. Also, suck my dick!

I went to the principal's office because I gave a deaf kid ear pods for his birthday.

I was watching a documentary about how storks carry babies from their previous life to the next.

In his old life, Michael Jackson must’ve been a teddy bear. The storks let him play with kids for a change.

I talk about the girls in my math class simping over anime characters and making random ships as well as for Miraculous Ladybug children's show, whatever the show is called, but it's a kids show. 💀 Now they’re searching up pictures of Tom Holland laughing in their absolute weirdness.

I like Tom Holland, but these kids man, they like him like they’re in a relationship. They might as well start kissing and licking the screen. They’re probably writing fanfictions in their free time when they aren’t searching up kids show characters, anime characters, and Tom Holland pics on their SCHOOL CHROMEBOOK. Their only device choice was a school-provided laptop which is monitored by the school while they are writing fan fictions on Google Docs and searching up some weird Tom Holland stuff. Imagine how Tom Holland would feel if he found out that there are 11 year old girls searching up some weird stuff about him.

What do you call a kid with special needs with a gun? Special Forces.

The depressed kid wanted a high-five from the tree, but it left him hangin'.

What do you call a committee of emo kids?

A cutting board!

I was reading the news and read that a kid killed his family, and when they interviewed him, he said he wanted to become Batman.

What's the difference between onions and children? Nothing, when you cut one everyone around you cries.

What's the difference between an apple and an emo kid?

One falls, while the other hangs.

What's the difference between a bird and a kid on the roof?

The bird can fly off the roof.

I went to the mental hospital. I asked one of the kid what its favorite animal was. They said a bird. I asked for a reason. It's because they both jump off roofs.

This kid was crying, so I asked him where his parents were. He just cried harder. I still remember him every time I pass that orphanage.

Me: Where's your mom?

Kid: [cries]

Me: [leaving from the adoption center]

Poor kids in American schools, they want books, but all they get are magazines.