Joke jokes
I always felt like a man trapped in a woman's body. But then I was born.
But in my defense, I was young then, and I had a womb without a view.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends how hard you throw them.
What do you call a taco in bed?
Es(tá co)stado.
What do you call it when a town on the south coast of England sprouts legs and starts walking around the country?
A walkie-Torquay.
What do you call a baby with red on it?
A baby in a microwave.
What type of bird does not have feathers on itself?
A bald eagle.
If you're ever bored, beat up an orphan, what are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
I love silly jokes.
What's the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms?
One's a good year and one's a great year.
Stephen Hawking is the fastest footballer ever--he could just charge up the Left Wing!
What's the difference between your dad and the mailman? Nothing.
The bank said go to the river bank. Oh, oh, oh, good fishy joke!
Q. What's the difference between my phone battery and an anti-vax kid?
A. Nothing, they both die at ten.
Why did the skeleton not go to the ball?
He had no-body to go with.
One orphan said, "Daddy, chill." I was like, "You don't have a dad!"
Why was the orphan able to avoid getting into trouble at school?
Because they couldn’t call his parents!
Kid: Dad, what happened to the kidnapper?
Dad: He had a nap.
Kid: Where is he now?
Dad: HELL!
What do you get if you add "ER" onto Hamburg?
Hamburg-ER.
I find bananas very appeeling.
Why is 5 afraid of 7? Because 6, 7, 8.