Joke jokes
What's the difference between an orphan and baseball?
In baseball, you know where home is.
Meat stands for: M - monitoring, E - evaluating, A - assessing/addressing, T - treatment.
So when you're shoving meat up people's asses, then you're monitoring them, evaluating them, assessing them, and treating them.
Why were there two boys on the bay?
Because they were gay!
Why does an orphan only have a Samsung? Because it doesn't have a home button!
What starts with "N" and ends with "G"?
Nothing.
Why was the duck fired from the train station?
He was a bad conducktor!
What did one mouse say to the other mouse when it tried to steal the cheese?
"That's nacho cheese!"
Teacher: What do you want to be when you grow up?
That depressed kid in class: Dead.
How do you get a country girl's attention? A tractor.
Things you say before sex, Disney addition:
"Have you seen my Mouseketool? Oh, Toodles!"
Q: What do you call a cow stuck on a barb wire fence?
A: Udderly destroyed.
Why did the orphan cross the road?
Because they thought they saw their parents. (Plot twist: the orphan got ran over.)
Teacher: How many kids are in this classroom?
Kid: 73 if you count the ones you have hid in the basement.
What did the banana say to the vibrator?
"What are you shaking for? She’s going to eat me!"
Why is 6 afraid from 7? 789
What did the big rose say to the little rose?
"Hi, bud!"
Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?
What do you call a fly without wings? Dead.
You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't pick your friends' noses.
Does it cycle now? 🚲
A guy walks into a bar, he's like, "What's your number, lad?" and the woman is like, "298-777-fatso.com" and he walked home depressed.