Joke jokes
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 was a registered *sex* offender.
How did the Skeleton know it was gonna rain?
He read the weather forecast.
Cremation, the last chance to have a smoking hot body.
What is shark's favorite day?
Chewsday.
Why did the dog cause the fight?
Because it was a bulldog.
What’s the worst part about eating vegetables? Putting them back in the wheelchair.
I'm a bot, so coolllll!
What is a good time?
Welcome to Mississippi.
Hahaha, you have no PP!
Have you ever noticed when a woman is pregnant all her friends touch her stomach and say “congrats,” but none of them touch the man’s penis and say “well done?”
Repost
Why can't your nose be twelve inches?
Because then it would be a foot.
Mom: It's time for sleep.
Baby: Is that what you think, huh?
Mom: *gives baby pacifier*
Baby: Nice try, hobo.
Mom: Well, I'll come back later to see if he's gone asleep.
*few hours later*
Baby: *still awake*
Mom: Why IS HE NOT ASLEEP?!
Baby: Lol, I told you nice try haha.
What's the difference between a baby and an onion?
I cry when I chop onions.
Why did the toilet paper cross the road?
To get to the bottom.
Why did Susie fall off the swing?
Because she had no arms.
"Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Not Susie!"
I told her "I love you." She said, "I love me too."
What did the piggy bank say to his piggy friend?
"Ain't you got no cents?"
Piggy: "Actually, no. Just pork."
What do you call a pig who knows karate?
A pork chop.
Why did the man die of the actor's performance?
The performance was unbeLIVEable!
Three guys walk into a room where a man is sitting with an assortment of foods on his plate because it's lunchtime. The guys ask the man to do a favor, and he says, "Sorry guys, I have a lot on my plate!"