Joke jokes
What is the healthiest fruit?
An orange 🍊—It takes Vitamin See!
Why was the cow afraid?
Because he was a cow-herd!
What does an eighty-year-old woman have in between her boobs that a twenty-year-old woman doesn't?
A belly button.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
It's me. I can't get in because Stephen Hawking is blocking the door!
Q: Why do I like bone jokes so much?
A: Because they are humerus.
"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Not Stephen Hawking."
What goes up must come down, apart from Mr. Vyse.
Yesterday I asked my friend, "What is a fish without eyes?"
They replied, "I don’t know."
I said, "Fsh."
What did the man's dick say to the man?
I just can't "hand"le it!
You wanna hear a joke? It's YOU.
Let me tell you how I escaped Iraq. Iran! (;)
I was trying to make friends, and this one person came up to me. They said, "Lettuce be friends?" I just laughed and said that was tear-able.
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
Lick-alot-a-puss.
What do you call a Mexican that lost his car?
Car-los
What did the hematologist say when his Canadian patient wrote that he's blood type "eh"? "Ah, probably just go with blood typo!"
There are two cows in a field. One says to the other, "I'm cold. Are you cold?"
The other cow says, "Yeah, I'm Fresian."
What do you call an overweight psychic?
A four chin teller.
Why can you punch an orphan and get away with it?
Because what is he gonna do, tell his parents?
A man once ate the left side of a person. One guy watching asked if the guy he was eating was okay. The man eating him said, "No... it's okay, he's all right now."
Q. What's red and crawls up your leg?
A. A homesick abortion.