Joke jokes
What's yellow and can't swim? A bus full of kids.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Pizza.
Pizza who?
Never mind, it was so cheesy.
What music scares balloons?
Pop music.
Why would the banana scream "ouch?"
Because it is getting peeled.
What did the letter A say to the letter B?
"Z" you later.
Why can't Sally hit herself? Because she has no arms.
Voldemort: Knock, knock.
Harry Potter: Who's there?
Voldemort: You know.
Harry Potter: You know who?
Voldemort: Exactly!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Daisy. Daisy who? Daisy me rollin', they hatin'!
What do you call it when you drop a bottle of food dye?
"It's dye-ing."
What did the computer say to the other computer? “Well, tech-ically we can’t talk.”
Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he felt crummy!
A man walking on his roof, carrying an axe. He drops it on someone below him and says, "Sorry, it was an axe-cident!"
When the emo kid is about to hang himself in the school bathroom, and the autistic kid starts swinging the rope like Indiana Jones!
Q: What did one atom say to the other?
A: I have my ion you.
What do you call a magic owl? Hoo-dini.
Beth was from Spain and she had a pig. What did they call her?
Beth-la-ham
What do you call a fat fortune teller? A four-chin teller.
Aren't my egg yolks amazing? Don't they make you crack up? If not, I better scramble!
I love escalator jokes. There's not too many steps.
They asked to tell them a joke, so I said no.
A bat mitzvah for sheep is a baaaaaat mitzvah!