Joke jokes
What's brown and rhymes with Snoop?
Dr. Dre.
I once read a book on antigravity, it was impossible to put down.
What did Yoda say to Luke during his wedding ceremony?
"May divorce be with you."
What does a stick say when it falls down? "Wood you help me up?"
Q. You know what really bugs me?
A. Insect puns.
Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Dad!
Dad who?
*Silence*
What would you call a person who hides in a house for 24 hours and then kills them?
Morgz.
A skeleton walks into the hospital and said: "Doctor, Doctor, I broke my leg!" The doctor said: "I see..."
Why did Sally drop her ice cream? Because she has no arms.
What’s red and goes 100 miles per hour?
Babies in a blender.
I painted my dad white so he wouldn’t leave.
Kate ate food coloring last night. She said she was dying inside.
What's the difference between America and a flash drive?
One is USA, the other is USB. 😂😂😂
What do you say when you wake up to the police trying to arrest you?
“C'mon, did ya really think I’d resist arrest?”
Why couldn't Professor Xavier fight Magneto? Because he couldn't stand up for himself.
How do you think the unthinkable? An iceberg.
What’s the difference between a dirty bus terminal and a lobster with implants?
One is a crusty bus station, and the other is a busty crustacean.
A man once sued smart water for not making him smart. Then a woman replied, “Okay cool, now I’m going to go sue Thin Mints for not making me thin.”
Chode.
What did one snow ❄️ man say to itself? My arm is broken.