Joke jokes
WARNING: READ THIS JOKE ALOUD!
Was it the pills that stopped his coughing, or was it the coffin they carried him off in?
What did the pretty young pre-pubescent 14 year old boy say when he got a homosexual pedophile for Christmas?
He said he was awfully touched!
Which company likes Jesus the most?
IHS Markit!
Yo mama!
How did the shark do on his math test?
Jawesome!
What did one sea say to the other sea? Nothing, it just waved.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because the one behind it wasn't social distancing.
You know, being a bitch is hard... but I found the person who's up for the challenge... you.
So, you're human, huh? Well, I'm a skeleton, so not much gets under my skin.
How do you make a peanut laugh? You crack it up!
How do you try to shout at someone on the bottom of the ground?
"Hey, sir! Are you dead?"
Ok, this is a texting joke. This isn't my joke; I found it on Google.
Mom: SON YOURE G-MOM JUST PASSED AWAY lol
Son: Mom, how is that funny?!?! I hope you're not laughing!
Mom: OH NO I THOUGHT LOL MEANT LAUGHING OUT LOUD
You know what pun is used for "waist?"
Nothing. You'll find nothing.
It's just a waste of time.
Every joke I make about 9/11 just has a tendency to crash and burn.
What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?
He wiped his ass.
Hey daddy *winky face*
How do bees get to school? On a school buzz.
I painted my dad white so he wouldn’t leave.
What kind of clothing should you wear on “hump day”? Camelflouge.
What did one tree say to another in a crisis? Don't leaf me when things get bad.