Joke

Joke jokes

Fish

What's the difference between a piano and a fish?

You can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish!

Blonde

What's the difference between a blonde and a bowling ball?

I can only fit three fingers inside the bowling ball.

Baby

Why did the dead baby cross the road?

It was strapped to the chicken.

Dinner

I was going to an expensive dinner with my friend's girlfriend because she really wanted to go, but he just got out of surgery, and he said take care of her, so I said, "Will do, bro. I’ll bring her back fuller than a topped-up water bottle."

Man

What do you call a man with no body and no nose?

Nobody knows. No body, nose.

Leaf

Why do leaves change color in the fall?

Because they want to leaf their old color.

Ear

Why can't you tell a joke in a corn maze?

Because there's too many ears.

Blonde

How does a blonde turn the light off after sex?

She closes the car door.

Poop

What did one poop say to the other poop? What's the matter? You look flushed!

Heaven

I hope there is a lift to heaven. I shouldn’t be making jokes though.

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  • Cow

    What did mama cow say to baby cow? -- "It's pasture bedtime."

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  • Horse

    Hears a clean joke: My horse got muddy, so I gave him a bubble bath.

    Now hears a dirty joke: Bubbles is the horse next door.