Joke jokes
A dog walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "I'm looking for the man who shot my paw."
Sadly, blind jokes are cruel. A kid at my school was punched the other day for being blind.
Sadly, he didn't see it coming.
How do you know if you have a high sperm count?
She chews before she swallows.
My version of the Roses are Red Poem in MW3:
I thought Soap could trust you. And so did I too. So WHY IN BLOODY HELL DOES MAKAROV KNOW YOU?!
What do you call Helen Keller in a pitch black, sound proof room?
Redundant.
Helen Keller walked into a bar, then a chair, then a table.
Are you a train? Because I want you to run over me. :)
What did the dentist say to the butt?
"That's the largest cavity I've ever seen!"
What is a Russian joke?
Something that will be funny for Russian people.
What did the fish say when it ran into a wall?
Dam.
I have a lot of eggcellent egg puns, get the yolk... Oh come on, don't be hard-boiled!
What’s pink, rusty, and covered in cobwebs?
Madeline McCann's bike.
I say "cow poop," cows say "moonure."
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.
What did the French Fry 🍟 say to the Hamburger 🍔?
I guess that’s a wrap!
Why does the large dildo not have any friends?
He's a pain in the ass.
My pal asked me why nobody wants to eat the spaghetti he makes in his restaurant.
Well, because it's impastable.
Why couldn't the toilet paper cross the road?
He was stuck in the crack.
If you boil a funny bone, it becomes a laughing stock. That's humerus.
Q. What is the most endangered creature in India?
A. The baby girl.