Joke jokes
Once I asked Siri to tell me a joke, and it asked me, "What is the difference between a large pizza and you?" One can feed a family.
I told Siri about my dog, and she told me if she could tell me a joke to cheer me up, and I said okay.
She asked me, "Knock knock." I said, "Who is there?" She said, "Not your dog."
What do cannibals eat to freshen their teeth?
Mentos.
What’s the difference between KFC and a woman on her period?
One is finger-licking good, and the other is just a fast-food restaurant.
What do you call a German that can't see? A Notsee.
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite food?
Runner beans.
What cheese do monsters eat? Monsterella.
What’s the difference between a Mercedes and a Skoda?
Princess Di wouldn’t be seen dead in the back of a Skoda...
Can a person in a wheelchair stand up for themselves?
I would tell a Biden joke except everyone would not stop falling asleep (including him).
What’s the difference between an orphan and an apple tray?
The apples get picked.
I don't have a joke, I just have a friend named Jack.
You know why Santa's saying is "Ho Ho Ho?"
How else is he supposed to give boys and girls a baby brother or sister for Christmas?
Me: Why can't orphans play baseball? Friend: Why? Me: Because they can't find home.
Moby Dick's father's name...
Papa Boner.
What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? A quarter pounder with cheese.
What do you call a doctor in Panera Bread?
Panera Med.
Cremation is my only hope for a hot, smoking body.
He was saying jokes, and someone said, "You are on a roll!"
Your hairline is so bad, when people see the back of your head they say "nice beard!"