Joke jokes
What is a necrophiliac's favorite candy? A Hearsey's Kiss.
Two cows were hiding.
One said: "Moooo."
The other one said: "Shut up! We're hiding!"
Q: Why did Sally fall off the building?
A: Her dad pushed her.
Read the next line.
Read the previous line.
Dad: I'm dying.
Son: Hi dying, I'm [name].
Dad: Really, now is not the time.
Son: I'm sorry.
Dad: Hi sorry, I'm Dad. (dies)
Want to hear a joke?
Your face.
Chuck Norris once pissed in the tank of a semi as a joke.
It is now known as Optimus Prime.
What did the blonde say when I told a rape joke?
"Can you show me what rape is?"
What do you call a Black person going down a waterslide? Sewage.
What is a vampire’s favorite fruit?
A nectarine.
Smack an orphan, what’s he gonna do... tell his parents?
So, there was this cop on the top bunk of a bunk bed.
Another cop walks in and sits on the bottom bunk and the cop on the top bunk bed said, "You're under a-rest."
What did the leper say to the prostitute?
"Don't worry, you can keep the tip."
My sister said the onion is the only vegetable that can make you cry...
So I threw a carrot at her.
Why did the orphan call Mr. Smith "daddy"? Because he put her in the vices and taught her a lesson about virginity.
What's the difference between a baby and a brick?
A brick doesn't cry when you throw it on a wall.
Wanna hear a dry joke? A desert.
Did you hear about the flood at the circus? Lots of people drowned, and there were two clowns that survived and two nuns still in the audience.
The two clowns ran over to the two nuns, and each one put a nun on his shoulder. Then they waded out of the big top, up to their waists in the rapid, turbulent water. As they were reaching dry land, one clown said to the other, "If you ask me, this is virgin on the ridiculous!"
You know I'm not too into black girls, but Kobe's daughter was smoking!
What's the difference between tuna, a piano and glue?
You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna.