Joke

Joke jokes

Blonde

What’s the difference between a mosquito and a blonde girl?

One stops sucking when you smack it.

Susie

Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Why could she not get back up? Because she had no friends.

Knock knock? Who's there? Not Susie...

Miscarriage

What word starts with M and ends in RAGE? Miscarriage.

That joke never gets old... but neither does the baby...;)

Peter Pan

Why is Peter Pan always flying?

Because he Neverlands. (This joke is good because it never gets old.)

Foreigner

What does a foreigner say when he comes to America?

I don't know, I don't speak foreignish...

Victim

Who are the fastest readers?

9/11 victims because they went through 80 stories in 10 seconds. 😂

Orphan

If you ever get bored, tell an orphan to take two days off their calendar. If they ask why, say, "Because you're missing Father's Day and Mother's Day."

Computer

One day a computer said to another computer, "Why are you so dumb?"

The other computer replied, "Because I have low memory."

Swing

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she didn’t have any arms.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Space

An astronomer walked up to me and I was like, "Give me some space..."

Are you getting the funnies?

Man

What do you call a man with no body and no nose?

No Body Knows.

No body nose.

Height

"I asked my friend what his height is?" He answered, "I'm sans'sational!"

Light Bulb

How many Russians does it take to change a light bulb?

I don't know, they just keep Putin them in.

Chicken

Why did the chicken cross the road?

To get to the idiot's house.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

The chicken.