Joke jokes
There are 5 cows in a field. One of them is the mom, the rest are kids. One of the kids walked up to the mom and asked, "Why am I named Daisy?" and then a daisy fell on her head.
The second cow came up to the mom and asked, "Why am I named Rose?" and then a rose fell on her head. Then the 3rd cow said, "Why am I named Violet?" then a violet fell on her head. Then the 4th cow walked up and said, "Merrrbere." Then the mom said, "Shutup, cinder block!"
What's tall, has a twin, and is in Manhattan?
Nothing, Bin Laden destroyed them all.
What did the ocean say to the other ocean?
Nothing. They just waved.
Did you sea what I did there?
I hit my friend.
He's dead now.
A feminist asked me how I view lesbian relationships.
Apparently, "in HD" wasn't a good answer.
My father left me at a young age.
He was only five.
If you put an amputee with no limbs in a snuggie, it becomes a stubbie.
I entered 10 puns in a pun contest, hoping one would win, but no pun in ten did.
Do you guys know why women have small feet? It's because God created them to stand closer to the sink when they wash dishes.
Why is the Nazi Anthem banned in Germany? Because Horst Wessel lied.
How are a gay guy and a refrigerator different?
When you pull the meat out of the refrigerator, it doesn’t fart.
I saw two men wearing the same clothing and walking together, so I asked both of them if they were gay. They did not hesitate arresting me after I said that.
Girl: "How do you feel about abortion?"
Dad: "Ask your sister."
Girl: "I don't have a..."
I wanted to see if she was anorexic, so I threw a Funyun at her to see if she'd use it as a hula hoop or inhale it.
I think you're eggcellent!
Q: How much does a skeleton weigh?
A: A skele-TON.
Wanna hear a good joke?
My dad’s love for me.
Why did Steven Hawkins go to hell?
Because he couldn't walk the stairs to heaven.
Say what you want about Hitler, but in the end, he did kill Hitler.
What do you get when you throw a baby into the wheat thresher?
An erection.