Joke jokes
Joke: "7 8 9" (seven eight nine), why is 8 (eight) scared of 7 (seven)?
Answer: This is because; in "7 8 9", 8 is pronounced as (ate). So because seven ate nine, eight is scared that seven would eat eight also.
What do you call someone with no body and no nose?
Nobody knows.
A man walked into a library. He asked the librarian, "Have you got a book on how to commit suicide?" The librarian replied, "No, you'd never bring it back!"
Are you a train? Because I want you to run over me. :)
What does a cannibal call a pregnant person?
A Kinder Surprise.
Once there was a midget man jumping on a pothole saying 43, 43, 43. A kid walks up to the man and says, "Why are you saying 43, 43, 43?"
The man stops and looks at him, then he starts jumping again and says 43, 43, 43.
The kid asked him again and so on.
Then the man stops, opens the pothole, throws the kid in, closes it, and starts jumping and says 44, 44, 44!!!"
Who is the only person time waits for? Nun.
Why did the skeleton not go to the ball?
He had no-body to go with.
Stop making jokes about Kobe.
Why did the chicken kill himself?
To get to the other side.
If someone calls you dirty minded just say:
"You are dirty minded as well if you understand what I'm saying."
The best joke in the world is me.
Don't say that you're not a joke. Jokes have meanings.
I don’t like to tell school shooter jokes because they are usually aimed at a younger audience.
Helicopters fly because they are so ugly that the ground pushes them away.
The only time rape jokes are funny is never.
Why did the T-Rex cross the road?
The chicken wasn’t invented then.
What do you get if you eat sugar?
High.
I said to my wife that she's so ugly that she threw a boomerang and it never came back.
What's the difference between your dad and the mailman? Nothing.
I wrote puns on a piece of paper like this:
P. P. P. P. U. U. U. U. N. N. N. N. S. S. S. S.
Then I showed them to my teacher, asking him what they had in common.
“They are all very tearable,” he replied.
Well, there is one person who gets it!