Joke jokes
What do you call a selfie that is taken by an orphan?
Answer: A family photo.
The convoy truckers are a joke.
What is red and tan and spins for about 50 mph?
A baby in a blender.
I am in trouble. My mum asked me to get six cans of Sprite.
But I got seven Up.
They're not jokes, they're notes now, get me?
I am in trouble.
What do you call a deer that has no eyes?
No eye deer.
This is not even a joke, it's a serious question... Is eating ass considered cannibalism?
Two simple steps to get 15,000 people to follow you:
Step 1: Buy a bottle of water (doesn't matter the size).
Step 2: Run through Africa with that bottle of water.
Perfect! Now you got yourself half the population there following you!
The UK is a joke. I want to leave ASAP.
Kid: Dad, what's a dark joke?
Dad: Well, you see that guy over there? Tell him to wave.
Kid: But Dad, I'm blind.
Dad: Exactly, also the dude had no arm.
Imagine if hitting the iceberg wasn't an accident and it was all just the sailors' fault like this:
Sailor 1: Hey Ron. Sailor 2: Yeah? Sailor 1: You see that iceberg over there? Sailor 2: Yeah. Sailor 1: You know what would be pretty funny?
What's long and black?
The line to KFC.
Do you know what you first feel when you shoot someone?
The recoil.
Do you know the phrase, "One man's trash is another man's treasure?" Wonderful saying, horrible way to find out that you were adopted.
What's black and white and red all over? The prisoner I just hit with my car.
Me talks to an orphan: Hey, I have a joke.
Orphan: Go on then.
Me: Your family tree.
Why didn't the koala make the football team? Because it got diskoalafied!
What's red and green and goes 100 miles per hour? A frog in a blender.
My girlfriend keeps calling me a pedophile. That’s a big word for a six-year-old.
What's the difference between my dad and cancer?
My dad didn't beat cancer.