it's jokes

Why did the koala fall out of the tree?

Because it died.

Biden and Trump.

That's it. That's the joke.

Men vacuum in the same way that they have sex. They just put it in and make some noise for 3 minutes before they collapse on the couch and think that their wife should be really happy.

How can you tell if a pig is hot? It's bacon.

Just accidentally emailed a porn link to a co-worker... So I emailed ten other co-workers the link and called it a virus.

Girl: Daddy, I've been a bad girl.

Priest: For the last time, it's "Father, I have sinned."

I couldn’t quite remember how to throw a boomerang, but eventually it hit me!

How many babies does it take to paint a wall?

Depends on how hard you throw them.

Little Johnny's sister, Suzy, sees her mom in the shower and asks, "What is that between your legs?" Her mom responds, "That is my garage." The next day, Suzy sees her dad in the shower and says, "What is that between your legs?" Her dad answers, "It is a motorcycle that gets parked in mommy's garage." The next day, Suzy came to dinner with blood all over her hands. Her mom asks, "Why is there blood all over your hands, Suzy?" Suzy says, "Well... little Johnny tried to put his motorcycle in my garage, so I ripped its wheels off."

Me explaining my child: when your mom is sitting on a table during her period, it's called the periodic table.

Roses are red, violets are blue, your penis smells like stew, and I want to eat it too.

Unfortunately, NASCAR has been canceled.

The woke people heard that it was a human traffic ring.

A guy is due to meet his friends for drinks at a bar but arrives late. When he does eventually turn up his friends ask why he is late.

The guy says, "Well, you won't believe what just happened. I was walking my usual route via the rail tracks when suddenly I saw a young, naked woman tied up next to the tracks. Of course I untied her and we had sex because I freed her."

The friends are cheering and one friend asks, "So... did you get any head?"

The guy replies, "No, I couldn't find it."

What did Michael Jackson say to the kid on his lap? "Just beat it, just beat it."

It's so sad that Stephen Hawking has a whole category on here about him and he can't stand up for himself.

Life would be so much easier if grass was emo.

Because it would cut itself.

I called the rape advice line last night. Turns out it's just for victims.

Your hairline is so pushed back, it's looking like it got slapped up by Will Smith.

How many people does it take to screw in a light bulb? It takes two, but don't ask me how they get inside.

My teacher gave me an A in Physics, then she tells me that it turns guys on.