it's jokes
How do we know that the ocean is friendly? It waves.
My girlfriend tried to make me have sex on the hood of her Honda Civic. But if I'm going to have sex, it's going to be on my own Accord.
Did you hear the scores of the African basketball game?
It was Eight-Nothing.
When is it bedtime in the Jacksons' house?
When the big hand 🖐 meets the little 🤚.
Dark humor is like cancer, it's even funnier when children get it.
A joke becomes a dad joke when it leaves for milk and never comes back.
Why are washers better than babies?
Washers don't cry when you put a load in them.
Why was the orphan single? Because it could not call someone "daddy".
How do you fit 3 gay guys on a barstool? Flip it upside down.
How many Trump supporters does it take to fix a lightbulb?
None, Trump says it is all done and they cheer in the dark.
Guy: Do you know how to draw women's rights?
Girl: No, how?
Guy: All you need is a blank paper, and that's it.
How many people does it take to screw in a light bulb? It takes two, but don't ask me how they get inside.
Sometimes I feel ugly, then I think of my sister and get over it.
I hate it when disabled people get bullied...
... because they can't stand up for themselves.
Bully: I bet your dick is so small when you look down you can't see it.
Guy: I don't, I see your mom.
Atoms never touch, so it means, we haven't touched each other or anything. So, sir, I did not drop-kick that child.
Did you hear that Daft Punk came out with a cook book?
It's called "One More Thyme."
When the school shooter knocks on the classroom door, and the autistic kid opens it.
"Give it to me! Give it to me!" she yelled. "I'm so wet, give it to me now!" She could scream all she wanted, but I was keeping the umbrella.
Husband: "I think I might take a picture of your breasts and frame it."
Wife: "I think I'll take a picture of your penis and enlarge it."