it's jokes

You call it death. I call it peace and quiet.

Devil: Hey angel.

Angel: Hi devil, why are you nice?

Devil: What do angels add to their food to make it a little more spicy?

Angel: What?

Devil: Angelpinos!

How do you make an orphan cry? Ask to go over to his house if his parents are OK with it.

I wish my grass was emo, then it would cut for me.

Yo mama so fat, when she sat on the roof of a Walmart, it lowered the prices.

To all the little rude people here, fuck you. I didn't ruin this country, it was Putin!

You call it a burning orphanage. I call it FNAF lore.

Cancer is like your dad. It only comes back when Blueface baby drops a new album.

If there was a zombie apocalypse, girls would make a "forehead apocalypse" since it is so big.

One day there was a frantic call at the fire department:

"Help me, help me! There is a cat meowing nearby. It is going to hurt me, it's going to kill me, can you help me, and send the fire squad right away?"

"Take it easy, cats don’t hurt us, just relax and wait until he leaves."

"You don’t understand it is going to bite me, it is going to kill me, it is going to be fatal!"

"Cats aren’t venomous or in any other way dangerous, now who is calling?"

"I’m Indy's parrot you twit! Now help me! Please help, please help!"

I was driving with my parent and shouted, "It's a superhero!" But I didn't know it was an emo kid.

How can you get 3 homos to sit on one barstool?

Turn it upside down.

What's the difference between when I opened the window in a car wash and when Kawhi Leonard did it? At least my dad didn't get shot in the eye.

Yo mama so fat when she step on a scale it say, "To be continued..."

I made a website for orphans.

It doesn't have a home page.

You call it a tragedy. I call it a 25 killstreak.

Why was Liverpool the worst bespoke? Rio supports it, hahah!

"Can I throw you away? You look like my trash can. Oh, wait, you *are* my trash can."

Your hairline is so far back that it would be a 70 mile trip to the back.

I don't struggle with depression- like, at this point, I have it down. I'm good at depression.