IT jokes
When she says she wrestles, so you pull out your dick and she punches it.
What is the difference between a human being in the car with the snow and a tree and a walk walk home and walk walk home from school and walk walk home 🏠 was your name on it haha 😂 day a day I was thinking of a good
Why can't the toilet paper be cheeky?
It's between cheeks at the moment.
Moose jokes, why did the moose fly with an airplane? Because it was a skoose.
Why don’t eagles 🦅 like fast food?
Because they can’t catch it!
What time is it when you get home, can you walk walk home, and walk walk home from school today? And...
What time is it when you stand on a pile of money in the bank?
High interest!
What time is it when you get home and you can't walk home?
God said, "Let there be light," and it was lit!
A man walks into a bar and sees a piece of steak on the ceiling.
The cashier says, "If you can grab it, your meal's free!"
The man then said, "Nah, the stakes are too high."
A whale went to the country Wales for vacation.
When it ended, what did he say? "I had a whale of a time!"
Did you know that ASL is a dead language?
Yeah, nobody speaks it.
My dick is like the way home for an orphan, its length is never-ending.
What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence?
Time to get a new fence!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Madam.
Madam who?
Madam foot got caught in the door, can you please open it!
Yo mama so fat, that when she gets in a monster truck, it becomes a low-rider!
Why did the mermaid want to go to the evil monster so it could get a real joke? Ha, ah, ah, ha!
You know the song "Getting Drunk on a Plane"? It was written by the pilot of the Lingard Skinner pilot.
A fish was swimming around in a pond when he noticed a fly flying around about six inches above the water. He thought, "if that fly drops six inches, I could have myself a nice meal."
There was a bear watching the fish watching the fly. He thought, "if that fly drops six inches, that fish will come up for that fly, and I can catch that fish and have myself a nice meal."
There was a hunter watching the bear watching the fish watching the fly. He thought, "if that fly drops six inches, the fish will get the fly, the bear will go for the fish, and I can shoot the bear and have myself a nice meal."
There was a mouse watching the hunter watching the bear watching the fish watching the fly. He thought, "if that fly drops six inches, the fish will get the fly, the bear will get the fish, the hunter will shoot the bear, drop his sandwich and I can have myself a nice meal."
There was a cat in a tree watching the mouse watching the hunter watching the bear watching the fish watching the fly. He thought, "if that fly drops six inches, the fish will get the fly, the bear will get the fish, the hunter will shoot the bear, drop his sandwich, the mouse will go for the sandwich, and I can catch that mouse and have myself a nice meal."
Then it all happened.
The fly dropped six inches.
The fish came up and caught the fly.
The bear came out and caught the fish.
The hunter got up to shoot the bear and dropped his sandwich.
The mouse went for the sandwich.
The cat jumped from the tree, missed, and landed in the pond.
The lesson that can be learned here is that every time a fly drops six inches, a pussy gets wet.
So, one day I walk up to my sister and tell her that she is adopted because she doesn't look like anyone in the family. She starts to cry. My mom asks why she's crying, and I say I told her she was adopted and I was there for the adoption, and we have papers. It was all a lie. She is not adopted, and everything is fine.