IT jokes

What did the cow say when it wanted to go to the movies? -- "Let's go to the moovies!"

What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?

An apple can trace back its family tree.

Sonic says... April 1st is the best day to do a school shooting. They will think it’s a joke! 😃

Boy: Wanna hear about my dick? Never mind, it's too short.

Girl: Wanna hear about my pussy? Fuck no, you won't get it.

Why should you always knock on the fridge door before opening it?

The salad could be dressing!

To all those who say this is a joke, it isn't. It's a core of humor and magic. It's a part of humor we can keep. Like if you agree.

I wrote a song about tortillas...

Actually, it's more of a wrap.

The twin towers were just tryna take after the leaning tower of Pisa, but they lost their balance and fucked it up.

What do you call it when Neil Armstrong started cuming in space?

The Milky Way.

When the school shooter gives the autistic kid a glock and he shoots himself, thinking it’s a cigarette.

Q: Why did the cow touch an electric fence?

A: Because it wanted to get electrocowted! 🐄

Fail and fall mean the same thing when it’s downstairs.

I just watched a program about beavers. It was the worst dam program I've ever seen.

Playing a game called 7-Up.

Student: Why can't I use a pencil to tap their fingers?

Teacher: It's cheating!

Student: No! It's the object of the game.

I saw a sign that said, "Falling Rocks." I tried it, and it doesn't.

I got hit with a can of soda.

It doesn't matter, it was a soft drink.

A guy goes to the store to buy thyme.

When he got back to put the thyme away he realized he still had thyme left. This was all for nothing, it was just a big waste of your thyme.

Did you ever hear the story about the broken pencil?

That's okay. There is really no point to it.

My gun is like my house, used to be full, now it's empty.

Why didn’t the moon eat dinner?

Because it was full! 🌕