IT jokes
Many were curious about how methane ended up on Mars.
I'm pretty sure it was because of Uranus.
Maybe if the grass on my front lawn had depression, It would cut itself.
Why did Mars turn permanently red? Because it saw Uranus.
Have you seen the inside of Ford's Theatre? It will blow your mind. ~Abraham Lincoln
How many orphans does it take to change a light bulb?
Obviously more than three because my basement is still dark.
How many cops does it take to change a light bulb?
None, they all beat the room for being black.
Abortion is becoming more and more expensive these days. So visit Ammu-nation and pick up an Armsan RS-X1 tactical shotgun. It comes with a free box of ammo and a three year warranty. Buy now, pay later.
Don't believe what your school bully tells you.
Always take it with a grain of assault.
How many skinheads does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
10; 1 to do it and 9 to back him up.
A man ate a glue stick. It tasted bad. He died. Hahahahah!
I pushed a kid in a wheelchair into a fire and called it "Hot Wheels."
I made a website about orphans.
It didn’t have a home page!
"Is that a quirked-up white boi with a little bit of swag, busting it down sexual style?
Is HE goated with the sauce?"
Why do we tell actors to break a leg?
Because every show has a cast. Get it, LOL?
I cannot believe no one's come up with a cure for anorexia yet. I thought it would be a piece of cake!
How do you catch a polar bear?
Cut a hole in the ice, put peas around it, when the polar bear goes to take a pea, you kick him in the ice hole.
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N. Oh my gosh, I'm peeing on my shoe, no one knows about it yet!
What sound does a nut make when it sneezes? Cashew.
What time is it when your kids stay home from school? S'no time!
So this guy named Andrew Furda was my boyfriend for like a half a week, so five days. Then bam, I cut my hair. He only liked me for my looks, and I hoped he regrets it because it is WAR, so if you see this, you're going down, Andrew!