INS jokes

Sister

  • My sister is the weird dark one and emo of the family. I'm the bright happy one. Once in 3rd grade, I got a huge A on mine, and my sis got a D-.

    In the playground near a tree, we were sitting and playing. I said, "Hey, a C- is not that bad," and raised my hand up to give her a high five, but she left me hanging.

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  • Cow

  • Two cows are standing in a field.

    Cow 1: Did you hear about the outbreak of mad cow disease?

    Cow 2: Good thing I'm a helicopter.

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  • Wheelchair

  • My cousin is in a wheelchair and wanted to battle.

    So I went up a step and said, "It's over Anakin, I have the high ground!"

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  • Explain Bear

  • Alright listen up you penis sucking chicken muching grape juice sipping BLACKIE!!! This is Explain Bear here to explain the joke. So the joke of “Why did the chicken cross the road” is that you expect it to be a funny punchline. But instead, you get a straightforward answer “To get to the other side” which is the logical explanation to that question. The humor is found in subversion to the subversion of expectation. Double whammy!!! So yeah that was another joke successfully explained by EXPLAIN BEAR!!!!! Dont forget to like and subscribe to my youtube channel, and until next time, BEAR OUT!!!!!!!

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  • Dick

  • The woman had a dick, lol, it's your mom ahahahahahaha, yeah YOU! Jhon man! In New York City I am on to you! I will be under your bed tonight lol get a bodyguard!

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  • History

  • Knock knock. Who's there? Colin! Colin who? Colonisation!

    Just kidding, colonisers don't knock before they come in.

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  • Pen

  • I was in a bar in Italy. Me and a hot chick got along, so I asked her for her number. I remembered that there was a pen in my pocket, but when I searched, it was nowhere to be found. I turned back, then I saw Pessi running with it. Shame on you, Pessi, for ruining my night! 😭

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  • Doctor

  • A doctor fell into a well and broke his collarbone.

    The doctor should attend the sick and leave the well alone!

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  • Man

  • Riddle: A man killed his wife in his car with a knife, and no one could see him. He threw the body out of the car and threw the knife off a cliff. When he got home, the cops called the man and told him his wife was dead and to come to the scene of the crime. The man agreed and rushed to the scene. When he got there, the cops immediately arrested him. Why?

    ANSWER: The cops never said where the scene of the crime is.

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  • Friend

  • Hi, people. I really need a friend. Can someone please be my friend? Say in comments if you will.

    Man

  • Why did an old man fall in a well? Because he couldn’t see that well!

    Why did the actor fall through the floorboards? They were going through a stage!

    Why did a scarecrow win a Nobel prize? He was outstanding in his field!

    Why are peppers the best at archery? Because they habanero!

    What did the duck say after she bought chapstick? Put it on my bill!

    What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!

    What did the three-legged dog say when he walked into a saloon? “I’m looking for the man who shot my paw!”

    How do you tell the difference between a bull and a cow? It is either one or the udder!

    What’s red and smells like blue paint? Red paint!

    What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? One is very heavy, the other is a little lighter!

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  • Helplessness

  • Your arms are open. They stretch towards me, Reaching, grabbing, pulling me, Surrounding me, Drowning me in my helplessness. Time standing still, inside here. Looking through windows, time passing by. Let me go, will ya?

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  • Boy

  • Who was the most successful transgender and transracial person in history?

    Michael Jackson. He grew up a poor, black boy, and died a rich, white woman.

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  • Prostitution

  • What is the difference between a hoe's birth Daddy and her pimp Daddy?

    The first daddy plants the seed in a cunt, and the second reaps the harvest from the cunt.

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