INS jokes
What's the difference between a Ferrari and a sack of dead babies?
I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.
What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eyed deer.
What do u call a deer with no eyes or legs? Still no eyed deer.
What do u call a deer with no eyes, no legs and no balls? Still no f*#$in eyed deer.
Biden: See you later, alligator!
Alligator: In a while, pedophile.
My dad told me a story today. His mom, my grandma, said if a bird gets in your house, someone will die.
That day, a hummingbird got in his UPS truck, and that’s the day he found out that my grandma had cancer. 😭😭😭😭😭 6 weeks later, she died. 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
A black lady goes inside the drug store on Eight Mile Road in the city of Detroit, Michigan, and asks the pharmacist, "I would like to buy a box of tampons."
And then the black lady is asked by the pharmacist, "Do you want to buy the box of mini pads, or do you want to buy the box of maxi pads?"
And then the black lady asks the pharmacist, "What is the difference?"
And then the pharmacist asks the black lady, "What is your flow like?"
And then the black lady tells the pharmacist, "Linoleum."
ohio lol
Four cows went to the county fair. They saw a sign that said that next year animals can enter a singing contest. They decided that they would enter next year. So they called their group the "4 Cs Quartet" since their names were Clementine, Candy, Cookie, and Columbine.
They discovered how they could win. After a discussion, they decided to eat as much corn as possible, so they would sing in perfect 4 part hominy.
How many rapists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Punchline: One, but they prefer soda bottles instead.
Why should you wrap your hamsters in duct tape?
So they don't explode when you f*** them.
Lady: Will you fuck me?
Man: No, I don’t have a penis.
Lady pulls down man's pants and looks in them. "Yes, you do!" she says.
Man: Oh, I forgot it was there.
My parents came back from their vacation in Florida, and all I got is this lousy nursemaid from Miami named mammie.
My grandfather has the heart of a lion!! 🦁
In a jar on his desk along with a lifetime ban from the zoo...
Every time I go to the store I look in the deodorant section and my dyslexia acts up. Instead of "antiperspirant," I read "antidepressant." At least I get a bunch of extra snacks out of my shopping mistakes.
Why did the man cross the road?
Because his dick was stuck in the chicken!
Question: What is the difference between a morbid joke and a dark joke?
Answer: One is 10 babies in a trash can; the other is a baby in 10 trash cans.
What’s the hardest part about eating a vegetable in a wheelchair?
What's the definition of disappointment?
Running into a wall with a boner, but it only hits your nose.
What do you call a malignant cell in Paris?
A Royale with cancer.
A player in Baldi's Basics says, "Why are you bald?"
Baldi responds, "Well, I have cancer."
The player says, "Oh, good for you!"
Why did Sally drown in the pool?
She didn't have any arms, remember!
Why are there no women in the NFL?
Commissioner Roger Goodell firmly believes in equal opportunity, so the girl tries out. Then, if she makes the team, we gangbang her to death. I mean, could you imagine what a scary birch she'd have to be?