INS jokes

Why does Sally have 100 sisters? She lives in an orphanage.

My son told me he wanted to be Batman when he grows up. That little shit wants to be gunned down in an alley.

What do you call four black people in a sleeping bag?

A Kit Kat.

I heard that to slow the growth of fire, you use a flame retardant.

So I threw my stupid son in the flames when my house caught on fire!

Jack and Jill went up the hill to have a little fun.

Jack got mad and kicked Jill in the ass because she couldn't make him cum.

Say "toast" three times. Spell "toast" three times. What do you put in a toaster? The answer?

What do Michael Jackson and Pinocchio have in common?

They both lie over little boys 😂

The potholes so big in Oklahoma Can make a whole garden.

An alligator is in a class, turns out he likes teaching!

I saw some toilet paper rolls rolling in the wind.

So I called, "Toilet Papers Rolling In!"

I was making a coffee for my boss and this was the supposed recipe:

1 egg 1 tomato diced bell peppers a bag of sugar sea salt coffee beans rusted nails.

I got fired and spent the next 20 years in prison with a dude named Papa Bear.

Schools be like "dRuGS arE BaD," then prescribe a 6-year-old Adderall for not wanting to sit in the same spot for 8 hours.

When you tell your Roblox girlfriend you’re breaking up with her, and then 10 seconds later you hear your uncle crying in the other room.

When I called the suicidal hotline in Iraq, they asked if I could drive the car.

Bob Ross fighting in Vietnam. "They're in the happy little trees, shoot the happy little trees and bushes!"

I was sweating like Michael Jackson in a Chuck E. Cheese.

911 what's your emergency?

"Burning in toaster."

"Toast?"

"Yeah so your calling 911 because of burnt toast?"

"Set fire to my forest!"

A boy was following me for 8 years, even into the stall. I finally told him I’m not gay.

Your hairline is so bad, when you look in the mirror, your hairline looks like an endangered species.

Kid: What is the biggest mistake you made in your life?

Parents: Go look above the bathroom sink.

Kid goes and looks, but then he realizes.