INS jokes
Cars are like bullets; you jump in front of one, and they solve all your problems.
Why do Russians drink grizzly bear piss?
Since vodka in Russia is so weak, Russians need a strong drink to get drunk.
I could have sworn while watching anime I saw an American Boeing B-29 Superfortress in the background dropping bombs!
What does McDonald's and priests have in common?
They put their meat inside 10 year olds.
Guys, put more comments in.
We are so close to beating the world record for most comments on this website, and the record is 171.
What does the Catholic Church and Worstjokesever.com have in common?
They're both full of child groomers.
A Russian walked into a bar... Unlucky for him I guess, in Soviet Russia, you don’t walk into bars. Bars walk into you.
Q: Why don't Indians play soccer?
A: Because every time they're in the corner, they open a store.
What's the difference between a dead body and a Lamborghini?
I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.
What do a pulse and an orgasm have in common?
I don’t care if she has one.
Q. What’s black and blue and doesn’t like to have sex?
A. The little girl in my trunk.
Why doesn't Mexico win any medals in the summer Olympics anymore?
Because all the Mexicans that can run, swim, or jump are already here.
Why do orphans have only 363 days in their calendar year?
Because they don't have father's and mother's days.
Why does an orphan only have 363 days in a year? Because they don’t have mothers' and Father’s Day.
If you’re American when you go in the bathroom...
... and American when you come out, what are you in the bathroom?
European.
Who are the world's fastest readers?
9/11 victims; they went through 91 stories in 11 seconds.
Why can’t Homer Simpson bring his family into Moe’s Tavern?
Because there’s a bartender in there.
What do visiting Goatman's Bridge and a bungee jumping accident have in common?
You hear a snap, and suddenly you're falling from a bridge.
What did the Queen Bee of Destiny's Child say?
"I'm so crazy in love..."
What do a 14-year-old pregnant girl and the child inside her have in common?
Both are thinking, “Oh no! My mom’s gonna kill me!”