INS jokes
What’s the most emo country in the world?
Qatar.
What’s the hardest part about making vegetable soup?
To put the wheelchair in the pot.
What is Michael Jackson's favorite movie?
The Boy in the Plastic Bubble? Why? The boy who was in the bubble.
If I make you breakfast in bed, a simple 'thank you' is all I need.
Not all this 'How did you get in my house?' business.
There are three Mexicans in a car. Who's driving?
The cop!
What did Osama give the Windows on the World restaurant in the WTC as a rating when he ate it? A 9/11!
What do a Rubik's Cube and a dick have in common?
The more you play with them, the harder they get.
I donated blood today. In the future, I will try to remember that I'm supposed to donate my blood only.
What's the fastest way to break up a bingo game in Baghdad?
You shout out, "B-52!"
What do you call a terrorist attack in Iraq? A selfie!
What does a gay guy and an ambulance have in common?
They both get loaded from the rear and go...woo woo woo.
I should probably stop making jokes about bulimia. They just leave a bad taste in my mouth.
Why is it so hard to find people defending suicide in any discussion?
Because they are really committed to their cause.
What do you call a black man in the army in camo? Incogneggo.
What does a burnt pizza, cold beer, and a pregnant woman have in common?
Someone didn’t pull it out in time.
What do you call two natives in a ditch?
A sleepover.
Q: What do you call a baby in a vegetative state?
A: A tater tot.
What did one orphan say to the other one?
"Get in the Batmobile, Robin."
What do orgasms and pulses have in common?
I don’t care if they have either of them.
"Officer, I drop kicked that child in self-defense." -Techno