INS jokes
What kind of people love donuts in the morning? Cops, because they don't have anything else to do.
What does Stephen Hawking have in common with David Beckham?
They both dribble.
Why was it so hot in a square room? Because all the corners are 90 degrees.
Why are there only 363 days in an orphaned year?
Because they don’t have a father's or Mother’s Day.
Well, a lock and a key were going on vacation, but the key said, "Help me, I'm stuck!" and then the lock said, "I think I am in lock-shary."
Why do women have no need for umbrellas? Because it doesn't rain in the kitchen.
Yo mama so ugly, when she looks in a mirror, it says, "Viewer discretion advised!"
I saw two deaf people talking shit about me in sign language.
So I turned off the lights.
Why was the picture in jail? Because it got framed!
I went to my local shooting range today but was surprised when I saw on the news that there was a school shooting in my shooting range. I don't know who snitched...
Why do orphans only have 363 days in a year?
Friend: Why?
Me: Because they don't have a mother or father's day.
What do a woman construction worker and a woman activist have in common?
They just stand there and hold the sign.
Gwen: Addison, I don't mean to be mean but you're really starting to be an asshole!
Addison: I don't know what you mean. I've always been an asshole. That is why people pound me in the asshole!
Kariah: That's sad!
I think it’s dumb that people say a woman belongs in the kitchen.
How else is the rest of the house going to get cleaned?
Why do we put round pizzas in square boxes and eat them as triangles?
Good news, people! Michael Jackson is still alive. They found him hidden away in a goat pen with all the kids!
A father bought his depressed son a new house, and then pointing at it, he said, "Hang in there, son!"
What did one nut say to the other nut?
A: "Candice deez nuts fit in my mouth."
What's the difference between putting a baby and a pizza in an oven?
The pizza doesn't scream in the oven.
Yo mama so old, her photos are in a museum and her friends are in a graveyard.